Hidden Past, Unknown Future

[Trillian]

BEN GLANCED AT THE BOUNCER at Risk, still feeling peculiar about returning here as a vampire when the memory of being a mortal and lining up in the roped queue outside was still a fresh memory.  He was side by side with Kerr, dressed up a little better in dark blue jeans and a button up red shirt with white splashes across the left shoulder and down the back.  It was a modern shirt, appropriate for clubwear because of it\'s lustre.  Not exactly shiny - something Ben didn\'t feel comfortable wearing - but still had a gloss to it that hadn\'t been outrageous in the electronics store and fit right in at Risk.

Funny, he\'d never really thought about clothes before, but now he had an entirely new wardrobe at his disposal.  The laptop had been locked in the boot of Kerr\'s car at the parking garage half a block away.  Ben was still excited about the purchase, though he felt a bit weird about letting Kerr buy it for him.  Ask for a notebook, get a computer.  He supposed that was Kerr\'s way, considering the massive house he\'d bought for hardly anyone living in it.  Ben didn\'t get it.  He would\'ve felt more comfortable in a smaller home, but the beachhouse was where he lived now.  He had to stop thinking of it as a hotel, and the only way to do that was to surround himself with his own things and actually live in it.

He was grinning at Kerr even as they walked through the door together, into the short corridor that ushered them into the main body of the club.  The beat was already pulsing in him, feeling like a heartbeat.  He didn\'t really miss it like he expected himself to.  He was supposed to miss it, according to all the movies he\'d watched and the books he\'d read, but he didn\'t.  He didn\'t miss his heartbeat, the sun or his old life.  There were two things he missed however; one trivial and the other very important.  He missed his car and the old way it used to look, for he\'d always wanted to do it up himself and apparently he\'d let Kerr buy the upgrade for him.  He also missed knowing where he was at.  He\'d never really had people involved in his life - except for the beginnings of a friendship with Kerr - so he didn\'t miss that, but he did miss knowing exactly at what stage he was at.  The only way to know that, was to know what had gone on before.

The place assaulted his senses like it did every time.  He\'d used the image of a steel box to lock his thoughts away into, and even as his mind rabbited on at him and he slunk past other vampires, he didn\'t seem to be annoying anyone.  He would have to ask Kerr if he was mentally leaking anything.  Right now though, he wanted to sate the thirst that was growing in him, enhanced by the smell of blood and sweat around him.  Without realising it, he reached out and took hold of Kerr\'s hand, drawing comfort from his sire.  Kerr was his only anchor in a strange world.  He\'d asked to be sired by him on the first night, and though their relationship had been rocky in the next six nights, he felt a connection with Kerr that made him feel better about himself.

Despite Jack and the knowledge that Kerr had fallen for Ben\'s lookalike, instead of him.

[Existentially Odd]

Kerr looked calmly towards Ben when his hand was taken and even gave him a little smile, but inwardly he was amazed at what a cascade of emotions such a small gesture could cause.  Amazed and appalled.  Just when he thought he was ready to be platonic with Ben and embrace the possibility of more with Jack, something casual rekindled the fires of his love and made him feel immense guilt for even contemplating something other than what his heart demanded.

He loved Ben with every fibre of his being at that moment and simply giving a gentle, reassuring squeeze of the hand back filled him with wonder and trepidation he shouldn\'t be feeling.  He was supposed to be letting the roller coaster go, not lining up for another turn.

Kerr wended his way through the crowd slowly, in no haste to drop Ben\'s hand or find a permanent place to sit; he looked the picture of assured confidence with his right hand tucked into the edge of a jeans pocket and his left trailing slightly behind him, connected to his handsome fledgling.  His shoulders were square, his chin up as he surveyed the club.  He had two quite contradictory urges at that moment - to hide himself away in a booth and wait for Ben to be done and to lose himself on the dance floor... while he waited for Ben to be done.  Jack\'s blood in him meant that drinking held no appeal whatsoever, for he didn\'t wish to taint the aftertaste (even if it was only imprinted upon his sensory memory).

Do you want to sit for a bit? he asked Ben, deliberately forcing him to practise his mental communication.  He would have numerous slip-ups, trying to hear and convey messages in such a distracting environment, but it would only tire him out for now and make him better at the skill in the long run.  The thought of Ben being back to his former intimidating strength appealed greatly to Kerr.

I could get us a booth or, if you want to go solo tonight, hang out by the bar while you head into a back room?  Naturally, the booths were occupied but he could Dominate any mortals in the way to want to move and his position as Oligarch held sway over some vampires; he was quite willing to use any of his assets to position them wherever Ben wanted, the word need only be given (he would be sad to let Ben\'s hand go, though).

[Trillian]

Ben was both terrified and excited at the prospect of picking up at Risk on his own.  He dropped Kerr\'s hand in order to adjust his jeans at the waist beneath his shirt, shifting his weight from one foot to the other as he fidgeted and thought about it.

"Um," he began, before realising that his sire hadn\'t spoken out loud and likely required an answer mentally.  After last night and projecting his thoughts all over the place, he wasn\'t keen on a repeat, but at the same time he had to practice.

The bar

It was short and sweet, only because he didn\'t trust himself to think any further at Kerr.  With that declaration, Ben looked around himself at the club, trying to see if there was anybody by themselves that he would be comfortable approaching.  There were several, though most of them already seemed to be eyeing off their own prospects.  Ben turned his gaze back to Kerr and couldn\'t help but speak out loud.

"I\'ll come get you, after."

After.  An innocent word that meant quite a bit.  After Ben propositioned someone.  After he took them into the back room.  After he got himself comfortable with his prospect enough to drink from them.  Depending on who it was, they might have questions or want to talk.  Ben wouldn\'t mind talking to someone who wasn\'t connected to the strange happenings of his existence right now.  He wouldn\'t mind chatting with someone whose history wasn\'t out of their reach, and their immediate future was predictable.

He looked around the club again, only paying half his attention to Kerr, because what he was facing now - going solo, as Kerr put it - was appealing on many levels.

[Existentially Odd]

Kerr watched Ben looking around, feeling protective and somewhat conflicted about his choice to venture into the club alone but knowing it had to happen sooner or later.  He would keep an eye on things, watch from a distance; he nodded his agreement when he was sure Ben was looking his way and then turned to silently make his way to the bar.  He found a stool in a prominent position (well, he made a stool be found when he mentally urged the woman who was occupying it to get up with her alcohol and feel like working her wiles elsewhere) and sat, leaning back against it with both elbows and his boots hooked into the steel footrest encircling the stool\'s base.  His gaze was focussed entirely on his fledgling.

[pinkroses]

It seemed like a long time since Ichabod had ventured out to Risk; after everything that had happened he hadn’t wanted to be anywhere near vampires. But it had been a good night, he’d been out with his friends earlier in the evening, friends he had got back in touch with after moving out of Mandy’s apartment and back in with his parents and they had been pleased to see him again, although there were so many questions he couldn’t answer. Still, they accepted that, and when he’d found out that morning that he’d been accepted into a university in the next state, they had been more than happy for any excuse to go out clubbing.

He was dressed in light denim jeans and a slim fitting black shirt which had a few of the top buttons undone, and a silver chain with various knickknacks hanging from it was around his neck. In the heat of the club Ichabod had rolled up his sleeves to the elbows, and his hair, which was spiked up with a little gel, also had a slight sheen of sweat in it after dancing the night away in various clubs around the city. Ichabod had been working out more in the last few months, trying to do anything to distract his thoughts, and whilst he still wasn’t ‘buff’ as one of his friends liked to say, he was fitter than he had been before.

Yeah, it had been a good night, but at the end of it, when Ichabod had found himself the last person in the cab after dropping off the others, he’d found himself wanting something more. A couple of the others had hooked up with girls, or were so drunk that they were just going to go home to pass out, but Ichabod hadn’t been drinking and he knew something that would give him that feeling that he’d been missing.

As he entered the club his heart was pounding and his stomach twisted with nerves as he looked around the club, trying not to remember the last time he’d been here, arriving with Lazarus and leaving with Kerr. He hadn’t seen the Irish vampire since the trial, if it could really be called that, but he wasn’t expecting to run into him again and if he did see him, or Ben, he had every intention of leaving, very, very quickly.

Taking a deep breath Ichabod moved further into the club, heading for the dance floor. God, it had been so long since he’d been out along, this felt kind of strange, seedy, but still it was thrilling. Ichabod couldn’t think of anything that came near to the experience of being fed from, and he wanted his lasting memory of it to be a good one when he left the city, not memories of Ben manipulating him into it. Although those would stay with him.

Ignoring the bar Ichabod edged around the dance floor, debating whether to try to spot someone who looked promising first or to just dive in and hope for the best. He was paying little attention to where he was going, so when he knocked into someone it wasn’t really surprising.

“Sorry,” Ichabod said quickly, his cheeks colouring slightly as he got a scowl from a human for spilling a little of his drink and Ichabod quickly turned away from the dance floor, coming face to face with one of the people, one of the vampires, he had least wanted to meet here.

“Oh fuck, Ben,” he blurted out loudly as his dark, panicked gaze took in Ben’s silver eyes and he took half a step backwards, his hands clenching into nervous fists. His plans of leaving quickly fled from his mind as he found himself rooted to the spot, surrounded by too many people to get away easily and his mind suddenly a blur so he could hardly even thing about moving. What the hell were the chances? The one night he came back and Ben just had to be here. And now it wasn\'t like he could even pretend to not have noticed him as he could have done if they\'d been across the room, he was right there and... had he said his name? Ichabod could hardly even remember.

[Trillian]

Ben had been spinning in very slow circles, taking in the club from a 360 degree view.  He\'d passed Kerr\'s view once, seeing him at the bar and smiling self-consciously before he did another round.  It was on the second turn that he felt someone move into his space, and his eyes glanced even before his physical self finished facing the direction of the newcomer, catching the surprise in the other guy\'s face and then hearing his name on his lips.

Oh fuck, Ben?

He blinked a couple of times in quick succession even as he stared at the fellow that somehow knew him.  He must\'ve met Jack instead, because Ben didn\'t know him.  He hadn\'t said Jack though, he\'d said Ben.  He racked his mind to remember, thinking maybe he knew the other from high school or something, and perhaps there was only shock because this guy had bumped into a school mate that was turned into a vampire.  Last time he\'d been at school was four years ago though

No, it\'s seven.  Three years missing, remember?

and he doubted that he\'d be recognised now from when he\'d been fifteen.  Still, stranger things had happened.

"Hi," he said, trying to decide whether he should pretend to know this guy out of embarrassment of not knowing him.  He gave Ichabod a polite smile, not knowing the history the pair of them shared, but there was a confused frown on his face also, because he didn\'t really know what to say.  Ben figured the truth was probably best.  "I\'m sorry.  I don\'t remember you."  Then he realised why he was possibly recognised - it made sense at a place like Risk.  "Did I used to drink from you?"

[pinkroses]

“I… uh, what?” Ichabod said, blinking in surprise at the smile he was given as much as the words Ben said. Those he could pass off as not quite hearing right, but there was no way Ben should be smiling at him. The look of panic slowly transformed into a confused frown as he stared at Ben, trying to work out what was going on. Was Ben messing with him? Was he trying to play with his head again?  But with that look on Ben’s face, it looked so innocent and confused by their meeting too, but maybe he was just acting…

“Uh… yeah, you did,” he said, not sure what else he was supposed to say and not wanting to make some sort of scene in the middle of Risk. Ichabod had never been good with confrontation and usually crumpled under pressure, so the idea of telling Ben where he could go shove it was tempting, but never going to become reality.

Suddenly he glanced around, a thought occurring to him… was Kerr here too? If Ben really had lost his memory, was Kerr something to do with that, was this some sort of punishment for what Ben had done? Maybe Kerr had thought it would be for the best, to simply wipe the slate clean, but… Ben knew his memory had been wiped and didn’t seem to mind. Ichabod knew he shouldn’t care; he should just turn and walk away from Ben, the vampire who had made his life hell. But he couldn’t help being curious about him, Ichabod knew he couldn’t leave without at least asking.

“Wh… what happened? You can’t remember me? Any of it?” he repeated, wanting to make sure he had actually heard right, with the loud music maybe he’d missed something which would explain all of this. There wasn’t any worry in his voice, he had no doubt Ben could take care of himself, just confusion and curiosity. And in a way this was kind of insulting, something which had been such a huge part of Ichabod’s life, and Ben had just… forgotten.

[Trillian]

Ben watched Ichabod, hearing him perfectly well beneath the pounding music, and not really thinking of it until Ichabod continued the conversation speaking louder than he had to.  Ben could hear him alright, it was likely Ichabod was trying to hear himself, and it was at this point Ben realised they\'d probably be better off going into the back rooms, where there was a lot of sound dampening between the main part of the club and the curtained off areas.

If Ichabod glanced towards the bar, he\'d likely see Kerr.  More importantly, Kerr would see him, for Ben had been partially blocking the view of Ichabod from the bar because he was facing almost the opposite way.  There was a river of people around them also, going to and from the dance floor.  The place was certainly jumping tonight; packed in.

Ben shook his head and made sure to speak up so Ichabod could hear him.

"No, I\'m sorry," he said, apologising again and wondering if he should go into it in detail and figuring he better.  "It was Jack, it wasn\'t me," he said, and realising what a puny sentence that was without the story behind it.  He leant forward, wanting to talk in Ichabod\'s ear so he didn\'t have to be so loud, tilting his head but not comfortable enough with himself or Ichabod to touch him in any way - such as setting a hand upon his shoulder.  Both of Ben hands were on his thighs, palms pressed flat.  "Did you want to talk with me about it in back?  You don\'t have to.  I haven\'t got much to tell you but I can still explain."  He stood up straight again, still smiling politely (a stranger\'s smile, used when answering doors or if approached for the time on the street), now coupled with a light shrug, expecting to be blown off for being weird.  Obviously, if Jack had used to drink from Ichabod using his name

that\'s interesting
how long did he pretend to be me?

then Ichabod would think Ben was a freak for not remembering.  People generally didn\'t go places with those they considered freaks.  It was a shame too, because Ichabod looked like exactly the kind of nice guy Ben would\'ve felt comfortable drinking from.  He wasn\'t dressed up like a punk or goth, wasn\'t behaving like a groupie, he was just... normal.  Normal was good.

[pinkroses]

Jack? What? Who the hell was Jack? Ichabod ran a hand through his hair nervously as Ben tried to explain, but ended up only confusing Ichabod even more. Although he wanted to be able to hear Ben more clearly, as soon as the vampire leant closer Ichabod jerked back, suddenly finding that he could move again when it came to Ben getting closer. As much as he was curious, Ichabod’s instincts were still yelling at him to stay away from Ben and he was expecting to feel a restraining rock solid grip as he stepped away, but it never came.

“No,” Ichabod said quickly in response to the question of going anywhere with Ben where they wouldn’t be in full view; he would rather talk a little louder than go somewhere so isolated. He was surprised that Ben would even have asked the question, but then quickly realised that if Ben didn’t remember then he wouldn’t know why Ichabod was so vehemently against that idea. And Ichabod knew he would hate it if someone was rude to him for apparently no reason, but just looking at Ben made him feel anxious, so what was he supposed to do?

“I mean… uh…” Nervously, Ichabod looked around again, clearly agitated, and then he finally spotted Kerr sat at the bar. Ichabod stared at the Irishman across the crowded room for a moment, wetting his lips slightly with the tip of his tongue before looking back to Ben, his mouth feeling dry.

“Are you… if I went asked Kerr would he tell me the same thing? That your memory’s gone? You’re not just… trying to mess with me again?” he said, his brown eyes turning back to Ben. Kerr had saved both of their necks at that last trial, so Ichabod saw him as his safety net, unless of course Kerr was the reason behind this memory loss. But Kerr wouldn’t let Ben go back down that route again, right? So if Kerr knew they were talking then Ben wouldn’t try anything, at least that sounded like sound reasoning in Ichabod’s mind.

[Existentially Odd]

The problem was, of course, that Kerr didn\'t know they were talking, because he\'d already been distracted by speaking with a sire and fledgling couple he\'d recently granted siring rights to.  They were excitedly relaying their experiences of new vampirism, clutching lovingly at one another with such shiny, happy eyes that Kerr couldn\'t help but be drawn to their joy.  A smile was firmly affixed to his face as he sat upright and turned slightly to the right, looking at the man and woman who were standing before him - not blocking his line of sight to Ben, but certainly holding his attention for the time being.

[Trillian]

Ben didn\'t miss the way Ichabod moved away from him so suddenly, and that only knitted his brows together in a further frown, losing the polite smile as he was beginning to draw the conclusion that something very serious had happened between Jack and Ichabod.  He felt cheated, that Jack would galavant around town using his identity, letting Kerr fall in love with him and making enemies for Ben when he got back.  He was beginning to suspect that someone who behaved like that hadn\'t ever expected Ben to return.

At the mention of Kerr from Ichabod\'s lips (proving that he knew more than Ben did about Ben\'s past), Ben glanced towards the bar where he could see Kerr drawn into conversation with a couple.  No lifeline there, unless Ichabod wanted to march right up to him and demand to know why he wasn\'t being recognised.  Looking at Ichabod again (and still not knowing his name, for Ben hadn\'t been told who the mortal was yet) he figured such a thing was out of the question.  He looked like a pinned rabbit.

The accusation of messing with him was enough to spur Ben into action.  He didn\'t want to know what kind of relationship Jack had with this guy, though it had something to do with feeding.  Ben could only guess, and felt suddenly weirded out at the thought that Jack might\'ve used Ben\'s body to sleep with this guy.  Sighing harshly, not knowing what to say, Ben shrugged and gestured with his head towards the bar where Ichabod had glanced over, knowing that the mortal had seen Ben\'s sire already.  "He\'s over there if you want to talk to him.  I\'ll, uh, see you later," he said a little too loudly so he could be heard, hearing the obvious lie in his own voice about seeing the fellow later.  He didn\'t want to talk to someone who would tell Ben about things he hadn\'t done.  It was the same story as with Kerr.  He wasn\'t ready to hear it.  It wasn\'t even him anyway.  Right?

Right?

He looked away from Ichabod now, figuring the mortal would move away from him and to Kerr.  Ben had mentally lost his appetite, though the physical craving for blood hadn\'t gone anywhere.  Standing as he was, his head slightly turned from Ichabod in front of him, he was aware of any movement the mortal might make.  If he didn\'t move in the next ten seconds, Ben would have to stare at him curiously.

[pinkroses]

Ichabod’s eyes stayed fixed on Ben as he was dismissed, not quite answering the question, yet in a way he had. He wasn’t trying to stop the human from talking to Kerr and asking him things, so surely that meant he was telling the truth. Taking a small step away from Ben Ichabod glanced back towards Kerr, but then stopped dead. The idea of talking to Kerr, like talking to Ben, scared Ichabod. Kerr was a luminary, obviously with his own issues right now, he didn’t need Ichabod going and bothering him about things that Ben could answer… and with Ben’s memory gone then Kerr probably wouldn’t want reminders of things that had happened since he hadn’t told Ben already.

Eventually Ichabod felt Ben’s gaze on him again and he turned towards the vampire, still with an air of a rabbit caught in headlights about him although he tried desperately to make himself seem a little calmer.

“Will you tell me what happened?” he asked in a quiet voice, knowing Ben should be able to hear him as he half gestured towards the back rooms, where Ben had initially indicated. Yes, it was a U-turn from his immediate reaction of ‘no’, but at least this answer was coming with a little thought, not just impulse that he might later regret. His body was clearly tense as he asked, Ichabod knew very well that he shouldn’t go back there with Ben, Kerr wouldn’t approve and it might still be something Ichabod would regret, but… it was just a few questions. And Kerr was right out here, obviously waiting by the bar for Ben. If anything happened Ichabod could go to him.

Even though he never had when Ben (Jack?) had been terrorising him.

But this was different and although Ichabod knew he was being a complete idiot he couldn’t help be curious about what had changed Ben like this.

[Trillian]

The guy in front of him

really have to ask him his name

looked like he didn\'t want to go anywhere with Ben, yet was inviting him to.  He couldn\'t help but stare at him for a little longer before nodding slightly.  There was a connection between them that went beyond Ben\'s unknown past, to an area where they were both at present.  They were both confused by the current circumstance and couldn\'t move beyond it regardless of what they wanted.  That was the expression on the other\'s face anyway.  Ben didn\'t trust himself to probe around in his head for his thoughts regardless of Kerr telling him he\'d had that ability before.  Apparently Ben had been rather talented at quick mind-scans of immediate intentions.  Apparently it was easier than reading thoughts.  Right now he was blind to what was going on in Ichabod\'s head; only what he could see could clue him in.

They were two youths heading for the back room now, Ben somehow managing to take the lead even though he\'d made a gesture for Ichabod to go first.  There was something extremely submissive in the darker blonde that was starting to make Ben feel uncomfortable.

What are you doing?
Why are you going back here with him?
You know he\'s just going to tell you shit that you don\'t want to hear

But if Ben had wanted to hear it, he would\'ve deserved answers, and so he applied that logic to the mortal that he was with.  He was going to get things straightened up.  He didn\'t want the blame for things he didn\'t do, and by the look on Ichabod\'s face, there was certainly blame to be had about something.

He\'d chosen the first curtained room that was free, pushing through the gauzey curtain to find himself looking at a cluster of pillows assembled together against a gyprock wall that was the back of the building.  Three curtains made the rest of the \'walls\' around their space, but Ben couldn\'t help thinking that it looked almost like a harem, what with the colours (purple, mauve, vivid pink and flashy gold silk pillows with opposing coloured tassels at each corner, though they looked huge and comfy).  A small table with a tealight holder and tealight candle within it finished off the harem look nicely, (to use nice liberally, for Ben just considered it tacky), was positioned in the centre of the room, in front of the mound of pillows, as a block for anyone that entered (including Ben and his mortal companion), forcing them to move around it to get to the cushions.

Ben had no other way to sit himself than to throw himself onto his ass in the centre of the pile, slightly to the left, in order to give the mortal as much space as he needed.

"I have to ask, I\'m sorry, what\'s your name?"  Ben began, feeling stupid even though he knew it wasn\'t his fault he didn\'t know the other guy\'s name.  Jack would know, no doubt, and Ben was of half a mind to demand of him how long the pretense had gone on before he\'d admitted to Kerr that he\'d been possessing Ben.

[pinkroses]

Ichabod folded his arms across his chest as they walked through the crowd, letting Ben lead the way. Like always. Ichabod couldn’t help it, even with people he disliked, who had mistreated him, he always seemed to end up following. But he quickly reminded himself that this was his choice, he wanted to know what was going on.

As Ben made his way to the cushions Ichabod lingered by the front curtain, gently chewing on his thumbnail as he watched the vampire warily. Things hadn’t changed much in Risk, it was still as seedy as Ichabod remembered and it still made him feel a bit uncomfortable, especially when he wasn’t intending to use the curtained off room for what it was intended for.

He shook himself out of his daze as Ben’s voice interrupted his thoughts and he stared blankly at Ben for a moment, then shook his head slightly, it seemed so strange, all of this, that Ben needed to learn his name again.

“Uh, sorry, of course, idiot. I’m Ichabod,” he said, giving a laugh that had a definite nervous quality and died down very quickly, after realising how stupid he‘d been by forgetting so fast that Ben seemed to have no idea about anything to do with him. Finally Ichabod edged around the small table to the cushions and he knelt down next to them them, pulling one of the smaller ones onto his lap and gently stroking it, running his fingers down the gaudy tassels, straightening them out with a concentration of someone thinking about other things, which was to be expected. He wasn’t anywhere near comfortable enough to actually sit beside Ben on the cushions, he thought he was doing pretty well by getting this close.

“So… um…” Ichabod began badly, glancing up at Ben again. “What… what don’t you remember?” As soon as he said it Ichabod knew it was an awkwardly phrased question, but he guessed Ben would be able to work out the meaning, were there other things missing from his memory? Was it a complete write off, or was it just certain things? Fuck, how did he manage to look so calm about this? Ichabod knew he would completely freak if he woke up and found out bits of his memory was gone.

[Trillian]

Ben sighed again, though it was a sigh of deep thought as opposed to frustration or dismissal.  He looked away from Ichabod

like in that fable?
the headless horseman
ichabod crane, wasn\'t it?

at the curtain closest to him, seeking answers that weren\'t there.  The question was obvious to Ben, even if badly phrased.  It was the kind of question he would\'ve asked himself, if their situations were reversed.  How would he react if someone he knew well told him he wasn\'t remembered?  He certainly wouldn\'t take it in stride like this guy was doing.  Well, maybe he would, he was very collected about the whole \'no memory but now you\'re a vampire\' thing.  On the outside, anyway.

"This all started ages ago, before I met you," he began, his gaze returning to the teenager(?) beside him.  Ichabod looked about his age, but some people were younger or older than they looked.  "I got hauled in front of the Oligarchy for Kerr telling me about vampires.  Which was stupid really, because I\'d come to Risk once before I\'d met him."  He shrugged, though it was still a point of contention.  After all, in Ben\'s memory, it had barely happened last week.  "The Oligarch, Declan Carey, pulled me aside to punish me, and cut my back with a marking that was some ancient symbol.  When that happened, I was taken over by a... " he shrugged, denying the whole \'earthling\' story that he\'d overheard in bits and pieces and refused to acknowledge, "...something that calls himself Jack.  I went to sleep, and he took my body over.  Now we\'re separate, and I don\'t have the mark anymore, but in the meantime he\'s been running around pretending to be me.  And he\'s not."

Obviously, he thought at the end, feeling lame for structuring his story that way.  Still, Ichabod nearby seemed enthralled.  If the other requested it, Ben would lift his shirt up and show his back to prove he wasn\'t this Jack guy, in trade for Ichabod to keep the details to himself.  Maybe later, when Ben had most of the story from Kerr and was cool with it, would he seek out Ichabod for his version.