The Long Road

[Existentially Odd]

"Alright," she smiled and began to move just as she felt a hand on her shoulder, holding her down in her crouch.  She looked up to see Alex smiling at her, reassuring her that he would go and get the water, so that she could remain with her husband.  His needs were obviously the most important to both of them at that moment.
 
"Won\'t be long," she assured Kysis, holding his eye contact with another smile, trying to think of something to distract him from the pain if he wasn\'t going to take alcohol.  "Was the weather good on your journey back?"  It was inane, but all that would come to her at that moment.

[Kysis]

Kysis was thankfully when she stayed, though with his blind side towards the door to the dining hall, he could not see who went to retrieve the water in her stead.  He could tell that there was some communication going on, even if it was not verbal.

When the tried and true topic of weather came up, he understood that while he generally thought such subjects were pointless wastes of speech, it was meant to distract him.  With the wet, strange, seething pull of the tendon through his skin, he could use all of the distraction he could get.

"The weather held well for us, though there were a few ominous clouds over Frankish lands." Kysis spoke quietly, making sure he did not move too much with the words, and not really caring for the other people in his house to hear what he said.

He wondered just how much Lam had told them to get both healers here so quickly... or perhaps he had been asleep longer than he thought, though it only felt like the blink of an eye.

"I hope Atropos was tired enough he was not too much of a problem." Right now, he would not elaborate.  There were other people in the room. If he could have, he would have switched to Greek entirely.  His accent had thickened from going back to Kreos, so it was a wonder if these people could understand him, unless they had dealt with accents a lot.

[Existentially Odd]

She chuckled at his thoughts of Atropos.  "Alex said he was surprisingly well behaved indeed, though he stayed to make sure that he was properly cared for.  He, uh, also had to secure him a new stall, so that took a little bit of time.  He didn\'t say, but I believe he managed to get one of the big ones again."

It was a bleak thing, to admit that in Kysis\' \'death\' they\'d surrendered Atropos\' large stall, with the belief that the horse would never return, simply because his master never would.  It immediately turned her mind back to thinking of all that had transpired while he\'d been... away.

She cleared her throat and tried to think of something else that wasn\'t related to death or Dagger to think about.  "Dora walked when she was just past nine moons old, you know.  She\'s used to it now and she gets into everything if you don\'t watch her.  I hired a new housekeeper to cook, clean and help me look after her - you may have seen her earlier," Lam frowned delicately, finding there was a haze over her memory, of exactly what had occurred when Kysis had walked in earlier that day, "her name\'s Lily.  Unfortunately, she does more watching of Alex than she does of Dora," Lam muttered jokingly.

It felt odd to share the goings-on of the household, like she was telling a guest where to put their chamber pot for collection in the morning or something.  There was... a detachment she couldn\'t seem to overcome because it was hard for her to resolve that Kysis was actually back, there was almost a block to her thinking because it was such a surreal concept.  The dead walked once more.  It was... odd, yes, but she knew she needed to dispel these feelings and start imagining him back in the household, as part of it, once more.

[Kysis]

"Yes, I think I met Lily." Kysis remembered Lam calling for a woman to take Pandora-- whom Lam seemed to have given a nickname since he left-- along with Matthew\'s help to her aunt and uncle\'s care.  It would be strange, living in a house with someone he did not know in the least, but something he had to get used to, considering that the manor\'s main attendant was now gone.

Carefully, Kysis glanced over his shoulder.  The man was tying off the lat knot of the stitches, the skin carefully sewn together, Kysis unable to spot any gaps.  It looked sturdy.  Next the man slathered some sort of wet substance on the stitches, the elderly woman explaining that he would have to regularly reapply the salve in order to keep the stitches moist and to keep there from being further tearing during the healing process.

She also stated that he should avoid any sort of hard work, or other strenuous activities.

For once, Kysis agreed to that without protest.  He had had enough of swordwork for a while now.  Yes, he would still have to manage the business, but he could not see himself holding a sword for a while, or training as arduously as he had before.  He did not see himself needing it.  Not now, not when he was so freshly back from the horrors of war and the verge of death.

"Thank you." Kysis meant it sincerely, though the words had somewhat of an edge to them, attributed to the pain.  He asked how much he owed, Alex coming back with the water at that point.  Kysis instructed the man, in Greek, to fetch the coin, which he jumped quickly to comply with.

Kysis did not dare sit up quite yet, not with these people still in the room at the very least, taking a very careful cup of the mug of water Alex had given him.  He was eager for these outsiders to be gone.

[Existentially Odd]

Lam\'s Greek was rusty; she hadn\'t pursued its use because Alex was more interested in acclimatising to Oberon\'s language than she had been interested in learning the language of her dead husband.  She\'d insisted Alex speak in Greek to Pandora, though, so that she grew up hearing the language of both of her ancestors.  When Kysis spoke, she thought she picked out the word for money of some sort, but she wasn\'t sure until Alex returned, just as the healers were finished packing up their belongings and handing over the container of salve.
 
"Oh, no, Alex, I\'ve already paid them!" Lam exclaimed when she saw him holding a coin purse.  She\'d paid them double what they got paid normally and twice that again for the two of them, so that she could ensure their prompt attendance at her home, when there were others lined up at the apothecary for their attention.  Plenty of money had been thrown their way already, and although the healers cast greedy eyes at the coin pouch, Lam felt they\'d been paid enough... until they cast resentful looks her way and then she relented.
 
"Although, I hadn\'t reimbursed our wise healers for their supplies, perhaps a generous tip is a good idea," she advised Alex, sharing a knowing look with him that had him forking out more coins for each of them.  Really, Lam was happy to pay triple anything they demanded, for her husband\'s sake, but she didn\'t want to appear to be taken for a fool.  Being known as a woman who would throw money after anything she wanted was not something she craved.
 
"Could you please accompany our guests as far as they\'ll need you?" she asked Alex, not knowing whether the old crone would need support back to the apothecary or not.  Weighed down with coin as she was, perhaps she\'d welcome the services of a big, strapping Greek boy to support her all the way back.
 
As they all left, Lam fussed around tidying things up, moving the blood-soaked towels out of the room and fixing the sheet covering Kysis\' lower half before she squatted down near his head once more.  "Now.  Was that enough water?  Can I get you anything else or would you just like to rest now?" she asked him softly, laying a hand on his arm once more.  Being on his stomach with one blind eye must be very awkward for him, she realised belatedly, but the pain of sitting up might be worse.  She didn\'t want to force him into any particular position.
 
If he was going to rest, it was also a perfect time for her to go to see Dagger and her family, and properly inform both parties of Kysis\' return.  A different reception would occur at each, she wagered, but all parties needed to know.  The sooner the better, even if it did cause her heart to race at the thought of it.

[Kysis]

Kysis was too tired to be angry at the healers for trying to charge extra of an injured man.  They saw his back, saw his wounds, and yet, were still lacking in the compassion Kysis expected of their profession.  It let a bitter taste in his mouth, but he said nothing, allowing Lam to deal with the situation, as she had complete control of it.

Once they were gone, and he heard the front door close and bolt, Kysis set the mug down on the floor next to him, turning his head so his left cheek was rested on his arms and he could actually see Lam.

Again, he could feel the pull of exhaustion, its rough, relentless hands gripping every fiber of him, trying to pull him down, under the black curtain of sleep again.  And while his mind reached up, grasping, trying to stay above the surface, it was a loosing battle.

"I... I haven\'t gotten rest in a while." His voice was hushed, heavily laden with the load of everything he had been through, dragging him down further.  He fought to keep his eyes open, barely winning that skirmish, though the next battle against sleep was already surging forward.

[Existentially Odd]

"Alright.  Well, I\'ll wait until Alex can be here with you, then I might go and see my aunt and uncle - they\'ll no doubt want to know your story and possibly want to visit, but I\'ll convince them you\'re too tired for that.  I\'ll bring Dora home, too, perhaps you\'ll be awake by then.  I won\'t rush though, you sleep as long as you need," she whispered, the guilt souring her innards even as the lies spilled easily off her tongue.

She would go first to Dagger\'s and end their affair, and then be as quick at her aunt and uncles\' place as she could, but she felt it didn\'t hurt to work in the notion that she\'d dally with her family deliberately to give him time to rest, just in case either took longer than expected.  Dagger\'s reaction wouldn\'t be good, although her delivering the news in front of his wife would likely work in her favour... she couldn\'t guarantee that would happen, though.

Lam had no idea whether the woman suspected her of sleeping with her husband; she believed she likely did, just as Lam had always sensed it when Dagger had slept around on her when they were together.  There was a sense of these things.  She did know that Alex likely knew about the affair, for even though she\'d lied about staying overnight at her family\'s residence, he seemed to always stare at her in a soft and somehow approving way.  Like he knew, but he understood the lengths she was going to, to keep her pain at bay.  It could all have been in her imagination, but it made her even more grateful for the large, silent man\'s presence in her life.

What must he think now, though?  If he did know about her and Dagger, would he break the silent stigma of such matters in order to tell her his opinion?  She doubted it, but her guilt made her worry that she\'d let Alex down as well; she was feeling more and more that she could never do anything but let the men in her life down, that she never would.  Her self pity had no place in the shadow of Kysis\' wounds, however, and she needed to push that aside for his sake.

"I love you, I\'ll see you when you awaken, my darling."  She kissed his hand (feeling wrong about kissing his mouth with such lies being told) and stood, preparing to take her leave.

[Kysis]

Wait until Alex got back?  The words drifted through his head, lingering, but not really finding any purchase.  Kysis nodded in a slow, lethargic, tired sort of way, as though he had to move his head through molasses.  That was what it felt like.

He could still see Lam there, next to him, taking some reassurance from that.  When she returned with Pandora, he wanted to be well rested so he could spend the proper time and energy with his daughter.  She was already walking!  When he left for Kreos, she was swaddled in cloth, so small, so vulnerable, and it had hurt his heart all the way through to have to leave such a beautiful child behind, but he knew Lam was more than capable and that his people needed him.

The thought of just how many people would have died had he not shown up when he did had him slightly more awake again, a sour taste in his mouth.  He had to go, even if he felt like he had stepped outside the river that was time, and everyone else had been whisked away without him.  It would take a great deal of swimming for him to find them again, but first, he had to sleep.

He smiled softly as Lam kissed his hand, wanting a kiss on the lips, but not having the will to speak it out loud.  Perhaps Lam was uncomfortable.  That could be it.  He remembered how skittish he had been, once upon a time.  That last small layer of innocence he had still clung to was gone now.

"I love you." There was something slightly desperate to his tone.  He needed to say it, he needed Lam to remember it.

[Existentially Odd]

She swallowed hard and watched him fall into the arms of sleep, leaving him only when she heard movement elsewhere in the house.  She didn\'t know how long it took, though she was stiff from crouching by the bed when she eventually moved.  She met Alex on his way in.  "He\'s sleeping," she told him, "would you watch over him while I go to the palace to tell them I won\'t be in for a few days and get Dora from my aunt and uncle\'s place?"

He agreed willingly, but she couldn\'t quite meet his gaze.  It wasn\'t a complete lie - she would have to go to the palace and inform them of her intended absence, wanting to be by her husband\'s side until he was at least able to move freely enough to walk around, if necessary - but she knew that, depending on how long her entire trip took, she might have to lie afterwards.

She went to Dagger\'s residence first, relieved when Mia answered the door.  There was wariness between them still and Lam had never been able to figure out whether it was just because she\'d once bedded Mia\'s husband... or whether she knew she still did.

"I have amazing news!  Is Balthus here?" she enthused, grabbing Mia\'s hand and dragging her along behind her until she found Dagger.  "Kysis is alive!  My husband returned to me this morning!" she told them both and, to his credit, Dagger\'s eyes only gave the barest of flickers.  Mia was predictably astounded and congratulatory, doing the majority of the talking with Lam, asking all the right questions that allowed her to tell the couple of Kysis\' injured state, the death of Rico, the destruction of his home town.

When Dagger made a snide comment about what sort of husband left his wife abandoned without sending word, she bristled, arguing that he\'d come himself, as soon as he was able, that he\'d just about killed himself getting to her as fast as he could, in fact.  Their eyes locked and the tension in the room rose palpably as her spine stiffened and Dagger raised further objections as to why she shouldn\'t accept Kysis back in her life (not that he said so in as many words, but it was implied).  His points were salient enough for Mia to echo his concerns, but Lam would have none of it; especially since she realised that what he was actually fighting for was continued time alone with her and Pandora.

Feeling cornered and knowing she had to make her point bluntly, Lam stated that regardless of the circumstances surrounding Kysis\' return and his possible mental health after such an ordeal, she was ecstatic that her daughter would have the benefit of growing up with a father now.  The blow struck Dagger where she intended - even as Mia agreed with her point (likely in an effort to ease the tension she wasn\'t able to define) - and, as much as she regretted hurting him when he\'d been nothing but wonderful to her in helping her through her mourning, she couldn\'t take her words back.

Dagger retreated to stony silence, his eyes telling her the tremendous blow she\'d delivered his heart and suddenly it was all too much for her to bear.  Being stuck between two men she loved had never been harder.  Blinking back tears, she blathered about still being emotional and shocked to explain it away, grateful for Mia\'s sympathy and kind words as she said she\'d better move on to tell the palace she wouldn\'t be at work for a while, and to visit her family to share her news.  She left the house with Dagger\'s quiet warning that she shouldn\'t invest too much time in things that might destroy her career and that if she ever wanted to talk about things, she knew where he was ringing in her ears.

She knew, certainly. But she didn\'t plan to visit him alone again any time soon.

The palace message was delivered efficiently and she organised two weeks of leave without meeting with Hew, stressing her desperate need to get home to her husband to avoid that eventuality.  Hew was always busy with something or other, so it wasn\'t too difficult to extricate herself as advisor, when there were others to take her place (though she was loathe to allow the vile man Phinneus any advance in such matters).  She hastened out of the palace after just over ten minutes had elapsed.

Her aunt and uncles\' house was an entirely different matter.  Mairin sat Lam down and had her recount just about every second since Kysis\' return, and every word he\'d spoken, so that she could understand how such a tragic mistake had been made.  She\'d spoken somewhat to Matthew when he\'d arrived with Lily, but he\'d seemed even more traumatised than Lam did, and still heavily in mourning for his lost love.  Respectfully, they\'d let him go to see his parents; not so, Lam.

Donald came and went throughout the conversation but, at one point when she and her aunt were alone, she was stunned to be asked what she was planning to do about Dagger.  Staring, dumbfounded, Mairin had clasped her hand and told her that of course she\'d figured it out and the man was owed a medal for bringing her peace in such harrowing times.

Lam broke down, confessing everything; her confusion, her sorrow, her guilt.  Mairin was excellent at calming her and reassured her that she was not an evil temptress for Talon in disguise.  She\'d merely done what had to be done to get through her grief and Dagger also couldn\'t be faulted for his caring of her and her child.  Mairin eventually convinced her that there was no blame to be had in this situation, that it was merely a terrible set of circumstances that had occurred badly.  Surprisingly, she wasn\'t convinced Lam should even tell Kysis what she\'d done, since it might hurt him and do more harm than good, but she didn\'t give any definitive instructions to her niece.  She told her to follow her heart.

The sun was sinking towards the horizon when Lam and Pandora finally made it home.  She\'d been gone just over five hours and had regretted that time apart from Kysis, but hadn\'t managed to pull herself back into calmness before then - she didn\'t want to walk into the house looking miserable and like she\'d been crying.  Passing the kitchen, she spied Lily working on the evening\'s meal and informed her she was home before she walked into Kysis\' makeshift bedroom, the lively blonde - who was getting more than fussy for her dinner and bed by this late stage - perched on her left hip.  She first wanted to ascertain Kysis\' wakefulness and possible needs before she set about feeding and bathing Dora.

[Kysis]

A great majority of the time Lam was gone, Kysis was deep in sleep, a good sort of sleep where he dreamed only of the events of earlier, meeting his daughter there at the door.  Pandora was practically wreathed in sunlight in those dreams, and instead of the sobering events which followed, his mind replaced them with his playing with Pandora, and Lam participating.

When he woke, there was a sort, wistful smile on his lips.  Then he remembered, that had not happened.  Pandora did not even know him at this point.  Alex was sitting near by, and offered to retrieve him clothing.

For now, Kysis only donned his pants, Alex helping him up the stairs to his room, which was hardly his room anymore.

Kysis wandered around the chamber slowly, running his hands across the unfamiliar bed cover, then walking to the crib, staring into that empty space with sad eyes.  Eventually, he found where his clothes where, exactly where he left them, perhaps the only thing still familiar.

With some help from Alex, Kysis managed to don a tunic fitting to his station as a lord, though it was not too dressy. Kysis did not want to seem formal, though the black tones he wore made him seem such, despite it all.  He was still in mourning for more than just his city, after all.

Apparently Lily as back, the young woman servant blushing as she curtsied and introduced herself to him.  After that was done, Kysis suggested she begin preparing dinner for Lam\'s return, which she jumped to immediately.  Alex went about cleaning Alia\'s old room, Kysis finding out Alex had been using it as his own for a while; Kysis followed him, sitting in a chair out of the way, the two having short, clipped, stilted conversation about what had happened in Kreos when Lam returned.

Kysis wanted to jump up immediately, but forced himself not to, very mindful of his just redone stitches.  Slowly, he got up, with the help of Alex, facing both Lam and Pandora.  His eyes, haunted, dark eyes, lit up slightly at the sight of his daughter.  He approached just as slowly as he had stood, not wanting to startle his daughter.

[Existentially Odd]

"You\'re awake!" Lam exclaimed as she approached, looking him over.  "And dressed!  Why?" she demanded, instinctively holding Pandora\'s front foot against her hip as she leaned forward and kissed Kysis on the cheek.  Their daughter had stopped kicking and fussing as she was pressed lightly against this strange man though, fingers in her mouth and wide blue eyes gazing at her father in a speculative sort of way.

Lam didn\'t want to think about the fact that Dora had only ever seen her kiss Dagger, but it came into her mind anyway, guilt spurring her into talking more than she had to.

"Sorry I took so long, I expected you\'d still be down here sleeping, you need to recover you know," she admonished her husband, looking at the bed and seeing its state of tidiness.  It didn\'t look like Kysis was going to be making himself comfortable in it again, any time soon.  Her heart fluttered at the thought he\'d join her in their bed and she couldn\'t have said whether it was through excitement or worry that she\'d hurt him by rolling around restlessly in the night.

"Are you going to even be able to get up the stairs, won\'t you want to stay down here until you\'re more agile?" she queried, believing Alex had brought Kysis his completely inappropriate wardrobe - the lord should still have his torso naked to air his wounds, in her opinion.

[Kysis]

Kysis gave a warm smile as Lam kissed him rather chastely on the cheek, though right now, he had eyes only for the little strawberry blond girl he did not even recognize.  She had hair now, showing some of Lam\'s wonderful red tones, and big blue eyes, and though she was young, she looked about as curious as one would expect of a child with the name Pandora, of all things.  And yet, he\'d been insistent upon the name, something in his gut saying if they had to girl, that was going to be it.

Ah yes, he was supposed to be resting.  Rather than immediately start defending himself, saying at least he had not done anything truly strenuous, he reached out a nervous hand towards Pandora, doing everything he could to stop it from shaking.

This was his child.  His mind had a hard time wrapping around it, considering how quickly he had to leave for Kreos after her birth.  He touched Pandora\'s arm lightly, still smiling.

Finally, he looked up into Lam\'s eyes. "I had Alex help me up the stairs.  I...

wanted to see if you had removed me entirely from your life

needed to see our room." Kysis bit back those other words, rolling his lips together slightly.  They still felt strange with that scar. "You know I cannot sit still for the life of me.  I needed to do something... and I kept it within my bounds."

In all reality, he could have gone to the markets to see how badly the shop was doing, considering the disruption in weapons being sent north with the dire need to the south.  There would be another caravan of weapons coming soon, now that everything had died down to a low simmer, among other things, like olive oil, though that was not for sale.

Alex shifted a little, uncomfortably.  He looked between his master and the lady of the house, whom he had grown somewhat closer to during Kysis\' absence; they both understood grieving.  And though Kysis was returned, Alex knew it was not the same Kysis who had left.  He wanted to speak to Lam alone, but knew it was not his place to separate them, since they had been forcefully separated for so long.

[Existentially Odd]

"Recuperating is something," she muttered, watching him pat timidly at his daughter\'s arm; the baby looked down at him touching her too, unsure what something so soft was all about.  "This is your daddy, Pandora," she told the little girl, whose gaze swivelled up to meet her mother\'s when she heard her name.  "Daddy," Lam repeated meaningfully.

"Da... " Pandora said, the sound more of a light, airy hiccup of noise rather than a word that actually had any meaning.  She was watching her mother\'s lips, trying to learn.

"Daddy."

"Da... "

Lam had never encouraged such a word - nor even the concept - with her child, so she knew it would take some time for there to be any sort of meaning to it.  Still, she smiled and nodded, using big, bright actions when Pandora mostly copied, reaching over with her right hand to touch Kysis\' chest.

"Daddy."

"Da... " Dora echoed yet again, now looking up at her father\'s face.

"Yes!  Good girl!" Lam congratulated, clapping the baby\'s hands together to let her know she\'d done something to celebrate.  Not knowing what she\'d done but tired enough to be excited by anything, Dora shook her head rapidly from side to side and barked a little laugh.  She stopped as soon as her mother\'s obvious excitement did and her hand went back to her mouth for her to gnaw on and stare at Kysis some more.

"She\'ll understand soon enough," Lam smiled indulgently from the baby up into Kysis\' eyes.  "Hopefully your stitches will be mended enough that you can start holding her, too - I\'m afraid to let her near you just yet, because she\'s really rather strong and I don\'t want her to hurt you with a wild kick or crawling on you.  Do you want to feed her?  She\'ll have some rice pudding while we eat, then we can bathe her and take her upstairs for her drink before she sleeps."

It was odd, describing a routine to Kysis like he was a stranger, yet she and Alex and Lily did it every single day - catering to Pandora while they ate their evening meal together, then Alex generally helped Lam bathe Dora before they parted ways, Lam taking the baby upstairs to breastfeed before she was put in her cot for the night.  Again, the surreality of welcoming someone else into their routine struck her and she was momentarily lost for words.

What would it be like when there was no longer anything between them?  No wounds to tend, no baby to introduce, no meal to eat?  Just... she and Kysis... and the dreadful burden of her guilt, the knowledge that just two nights before, she\'d been in another bed, with another man and Pandora slumbering nearby while they... it didn\'t bear thinking on.  Honestly, would Kysis really be up to sharing a bed with her?  What if she flailed in her sleep as she usually did and hurt him?  She would broach that, when the time came.

[Kysis]

Kysis felt a sort of soft warmth well up inside of him when he heard Pandora speak, even if it was in small little bits, just part of the word Lam was trying to goad her into saying.  When Pandora finally looked at him and said Da, Kysis had to close his eyes and take a deep breath, all of it washing over him so quickly.

The transition between the embattled Kreos to here was so startling that his nerves and wits were still a bit frayed.  He would have to take this in steps, even if it meant there was still some distance between him and his family.  Too much at once and...

Kysis opened his eyes again, swallowing at the hard lump which had formed in his throat to no avail.

Perhaps it was best if he would have to wait to handle her for a while.  If not for his mending physically, for his mending emotionally.  Kysis nodded mutely, trying to take in all of the information he was suddenly rushed with.  He knew nothing about the care babies needed, nor of the routine Lam might have established, so it was all frightfully new.  Kysis knew he would not remember it all, but for now, he nodded again, realizing that he would need to supply some sort of answer.

"Yes, I would like to feed her." Kysis looked from Lam to Pandora again.  She was such a small, innocent, helpless creature.  She needed taking care of at every moment, careful attention.  Kysis felt a pang for a moment.  Should he have stayed in Oberon, despite his people\'s call?  Already he had fallen short of his duty as lord to Kreos, having let the place fall to Ottoman control.  Yes, they had managed to save so many people, but...

No matter what, he would not be leaving Oberon any time soon, for Pandora\'s sake.

His mind trailed off for a moment, to those who would be moving to the north as well.  Jax, filled with shame at failing as Captain of Kreos\' guard, would be traveling north, along with Calista, his cousin, who had in her care a child almost a whole year older than Pandora.  When Kysis had seen poor Calypso without a father, he knew he had to make haste to Oberon for his own daughter.

"Does Pandora have any playmates?  Calista is relocating here, and her daughter..." Kysis looked away, having to steady his mind for a moment.

[Existentially Odd]

"Calista!" Lam cried, excited by the news... until Kysis\' reaction registered, along with his words.  "Just her daughter?  Tiberius... ?" she asked tremulously, receiving her answer in his eyes without him even having to say anything.  "Oh no," she breathed, tears coming to her eyes.  The war had taken too many good people, she\'d really liked Tiberius.

Pandora, discontent with all the standing around and talking, took that moment to start crying, grappling at the front of her mother\'s tunic and swiping her face against the breasts that were denied her.  Lam frowned down at her tired daughter, telling her, "No!" in a firm voice that only made Dora cry harder.

"Come on, let\'s get some food," she told Kysis, ignoring the dramatic crying in her ear.  Pandora didn\'t like being reprimanded but it only made Lam do it more often; the redhead feared what her willful, beautiful child would become if she was always given her own way (and it was likely, if she grew up to retain the angelic beauty she possessed now - the world was kinder to the pretty ones).

She walked into the kitchen, where they ate their meals.  The dining room had seemed so big and formal when Kysis was gone, that she, Alex, Lily and Pandora had taken to just using the worn and solid kitchen table instead.  Pandora had her own chair, fashioned by a woodworker in Oberon, that was tall enough to bring her up to Lam\'s eye level and had a tray on the front of it to place her food bowl on while she was fed.  Lam placed her daughter in it now - unsurprised when her squalling immediately stopped, because she recognised she was about to be fed and the tears had been false anyway - and pushed her against the table so she would be stabilised while she and Lily indulged in a little shorthand conversation, evidence that they did this every meal.

"She in the chair?"

"Yes, is dinner...?"

"Almost.  Hers is there, on the warming plate."

"Ah, good, her daddy\'s going to feed her."

"He got a rain coat on?"

"I haven\'t warned him yet, where\'s her..?"

"There\'s a clean bib in the washing over-"

"Ah yes, I completely forgot it was on the line."

"That\'s what I\'m here for.  Is Alex...?"

"Actually, I\'m not sure, I\'ll just go and see, he was in... here, tie this on and feed her small mouthsful of this, with this small spoon.  Hopefully she\'s as hungry as I think she is, and she won\'t end up spitting any out at you - but I can\'t guarantee you\'ll walk away clean!" Lam warned with a laugh as she handed Kysis the small square of material she\'d dug from the washing basket on a chair by the back door - it had strings dangling from it that made it obvious (to her) that the cloth was to be tied around Pandora\'s neck to catch her food dribbles - and a bowl filled with a small amount of sloppy, blandly-coloured rice cereal in it.

With a vague gesture that indicated Kysis should sit in one of the chairs either side of Pandora\'s chair, at the head of the table, Lam left the room, intending to see what was taking Alex so long to follow them into the kitchen.  He was rarely late for meals, though she supposed perhaps he was hanging back to allow Kysis to take over the quasi-father role he\'d been forced to adopt in his lord\'s absence.  Alex was thoughtful like that.