Author Topic: Swathe (Read 11686 times)

Existentially Odd · « **on:** July 24, 2007, 09:55:46 PM »

Kerr opened his eyes, squeezed them closed and then fluttered them open again. He stretched, enjoying the feel of Ben\'s body pressed closely to his and not bothered about waking him. This was the fourth night since he\'d been told he was his fledgling\'s heart and all was still well; the sooner he got to look into those beautiful eyes, the better.

Of course, it helped that they hadn\'t said too much else to one another that could lead to a controversial conversation - and possibly a fight - but Kerr wasn\'t compelled to push. He was still afraid of what he\'d be told and he had focussed instead on keeping things calm and getting to know his fledgling a bit better. It was a surprise, really, how little he\'d known about Ben\'s living habits and how much he\'d assumed.

They slept naked in bed and showered together every night, for instance, yet Ben still insisted on keeping himself covered if at all convenient. There was nothing manic or obsessive about it, of course, it was just a prudish habit he seemed to have. He also had the instinct to tidy everything - the few things Kerr left out on the coffee table often got straightened into a neat pile or dirty clothes were folded to be put in the dirty clothes basket in the bathroom. Admittedly, Kerr found this latter habit a bit odd, wondering why anyone would feel the need to neatly arrange clothes that were dirty, but he said nothing.

It was just... the difference of belief meeting reality and he wasn\'t judging it, just learning from it.

Either way, every night had led to a little more understanding, a lot more calmness and a truckload more comfort in each other\'s presence. Kerr didn\'t see Lazarus with Ben every time he closed his eyes now - hadn\'t for two nights, in fact - and he was even beginning to forget what his fledgling looked like with his other sire.

Enough time and togetherness had passed now, that he was just Ben, his love, and someone he was excited by and proud to have with him - especially when they left the apartment at the beginning of every night to feed. Kerr had developed a secret little habit of picking people to feed from that admired Ben\'s looks as they passed by, enjoying scanning their minds for such inconsequential thoughts as he or Ben fed, simply because he was proud to be seen in the blonde\'s presence. Stupid, but true.

Relaxing after his stretch, Kerr returned to his habitual position around Ben, kissing his forehead and his cheek, as usual. He felt more positive than ever tonight, and a little restless, too. Instead of touching his fledgling\'s skin comfortingly, he caressed with the flat of his left hand, fingertips outlining muscles he\'d barely known when Ben was mortal and still felt he was learning now that he was a vampire. He wondered idly, as he touched with earnest curiosity, if it was a full moon tonight. The air certainly seemed different, somehow.

Because Ben didn\'t seem interested in responding to his strokes and prods, Kerr began nudging against the blonde\'s face, kissing his eyelids and nose without response. Somehow, he found his way to Ben\'s lips and began nibbling at the corner, fitting his own lips between the fledgling\'s and brushing his fingertips down his side, willing his love to wake up.

Trillian · « **Reply #1 on:** July 24, 2007, 10:08:13 PM »

Ben\'s eyelids fluttered and opened partially at the taste of Kerr\'s mouth upon his lips, and he licked them because it was his habit to upon waking, finding Kerr\'s lower lip and opening his mouth slightly to invite Kerr\'s kiss. It was done dreamily, with Ben partially aware, overwhelmed with Kerr\'s proximity, smell and now taste, for it to take a quality that was not quite real but very pleasant.

A soft sound escaped him. It was meant to be an enquiry but came out like one of his sounds when he used to be fed from, a kind of whimpering sigh before his hands twitched upon Kerr\'s side and then fingernails scratched lightly across Kerr\'s back.

He thought he was imagining this, though it seemed a little more real than false, what with the uncomfortable crease of the sheet upon his ankle, causing him to shift his leg slightly, finding it moved over Kerr\'s own, toes stroking Kerr\'s foot in a way that felt surprisingly cosy.

Existentially Odd · « **Reply #2 on:** July 24, 2007, 10:17:06 PM »

Kerr smiled into the kiss, surprised to have it returned in such a fashion, realising Ben was likely not awake enough yet to do anything but respond instinctively... hoping he knew who it was. That thought had him wrapping up the contact, until that little noise registered and tapped something deep within him. Old memories stirred and wrapped about him, reminding him what it was to feed from Ben as a mortal, long ago, imbuing him with the blush of that naive wonderment anew.

He chuckled and pulled back after a few more soft touches of tongues and lips, feeling a little like he was being overbearing but encouraged by those nails raking the sensitive skin of his back, causing him to shiver. "Evening, love," he said warmly and trailed fingertips down Ben\'s arm, reaching his hand and impulsively carrying it with him as he settled back onto his own pillow, toying with it and pressing his lips worshipfully to the inside of Ben\'s wrist.

Trillian · « **Reply #3 on:** July 24, 2007, 10:22:07 PM »

Ben smiled lightly and his eyes opened fully at Kerr\'s retreat, bidding him evening as he watched and felt his wrist being kissed, causing a tremble to carry down his spine and the smile to turn into a twisting of lips that was wanton. He was breathing, something Ben still did even though he didn\'t have to, and it was more because his body associated such tingles and tremors carrying throughout him as a sexual act which caused him to breathe more heavily. His breaths were soft, shallow, not enough to have sustained his living self, but certainly more than his body needed.

His fingers curled a little on the hand Kerr kissed, and his leg shifted to caress Kerr\'s, rubbing gently because he needed to do something about that shiver that a simple act of wrist-kissing enabled.

Existentially Odd · « **Reply #4 on:** July 24, 2007, 10:34:14 PM »

Yes, he was definitely being encouraged. Ben\'s smile, his fingers touching his face, his foot moving on his leg... all these subtle things convinced Kerr that his attentions were welcome. Emboldened, he scraped teeth across the fledgling\'s wrist before kissing his way up his inner forearm, nipping and swirling his tongue on the inside of Ben\'s elbow, wondering if he would get a giggle from this.

His body had turned and rolled more on top of the blonde\'s again - since he had to follow up the inside of his arm - and he worked his left leg between Ben\'s, enjoying the friction that moving it slowly up and down caused.

His mouth moved away from the joint of its own accord and he soon found his kisses cresting Ben\'s bicep, crossing his shoulder and settling in at his throat. The hand that had been supporting the fledgling\'s arm for the sake of his attentions slid around and entwined fingers with Ben\'s, the coupled hands snuggled against their hips.

Trillian · « **Reply #5 on:** July 24, 2007, 10:42:27 PM »

He didn\'t get a giggle, but he did get another whimpering sigh and a shiver, the inside of Ben\'s elbow eliciting a spark throughout his body as Kerr discovered a sensitive part of his fledgling. Ben\'s free hand reached up and found Kerr\'s shoulder, caressing it in circles for a moment before moving past to his back and stroking Kerr\'s lengthy hair, tangling fingers into it before slowly brushing them out before delving in again, his lips parting with soft gasps as Kerr paid attention to his throat, sparking twitches in Ben\'s groin, the fledgling not too shy to shift his hips upward slightly, before lowering back on the mattress and then shifting up again; an age old motion that couldn\'t be misinterpreted.

Existentially Odd · « **Reply #6 on:** July 24, 2007, 11:09:18 PM »

Kerr released a soft, "Oh," of surprise and decided that although he certainly hadn\'t intended this result when he\'d tried to force Ben awake, he was definitely all for it now - especially with the surprisingly intimate act of his hair being played with. His scalp was tingling wildly, unused to such attentions by anything but a brush or Kerr\'s own fingers - neither of which could produce such lovely results as these.

Instinctively, he shifted his hips onto Ben\'s thrusting ones, lifting the hand he held above the blonde\'s head (like he was pinning him) and sliding his lips up, over his jaw and fully back onto his mouth. His tongue delved as he subtly worked on positioning his legs between Ben\'s, supporting himself with his right hand flat on the mattress on the outside of Ben\'s shoulder and upon the hand he held prisoner.

He kissed his fledgling passionately then, rocking his growing erection against the blonde\'s, marvelling at how this had come about. Certainly, he\'d been becoming more and more aware of Ben over the past few nights, captivated by the way he might move every now and then, or the way his lovely body posed quite naturally so that his muscles rippled or he dipped his head beguilingly. He hadn\'t been plotting to start kissing him though - just stopped himself whenever he\'d got the urge and told himself that now wasn\'t the time.

Apparently, the time was now and he certainly wasn\'t being discouraged. The eagerness was, in fact, almost overwhelming and it suddenly occurred to him that Ben might be hungry and that what he was receiving was actually inspired by blood lust, rather than the regular kind. He broke the kiss and looked down at his flegling after a while, smiling indulgently. "Are you needing to feed immediately?" he murmured, aware his question could be taken a couple of ways.

Trillian · « **Reply #7 on:** July 25, 2007, 04:47:14 AM »

The kiss was responded to with growing ardour, Ben\'s tongue swiping at its invader, pressing firmly enough to chase Kerr\'s tongue into his mouth before his sire retreated enough to speak, to ask that question of confirmation.

"Why? What have you got?" Ben asked thickly, certainly not looking like he was thirsting for blood. There was a difference, and it could be seen as Kerr gazed down at Ben. The fledgling had enough blood in him to tinge his cheeks a very slight pink, flush with lust with Kerr pressed atop him.

He squirmed beneath Kerr, with his sire holding his hand on the pillow above his head made him feel strangely sexy. He licked his lips and looked at Kerr\'s mouth, liking the feel of the stud in his mouth for it brought back warm and cosy memories, along with the passion he\'d always felt for Kerr.

Existentially Odd · « **Reply #8 on:** July 25, 2007, 06:04:31 AM »

Kerr quite forgot what he\'d asked, for a time. He was too taken by the way Ben looked, by the feel of him writhing beneath, by the accelerated awareness of the blonde that he was experiencing. There\'d been cuddles of comfort and kisses born of the same origin, of course, and a lot of hush between them... but that was all tame and polite compared to the aching he was feeling now, which was raw and pounding.

They\'d kissed like this a few times, never moved like this, and Kerr found the desire for it was buried inside a very, very large part of himself, but in a place he had denied himself looking. It was well and truly exposed, now.

"Uh... nothing," he eventually said, a dazed half smile lifting the left side of his lips as he watched Ben yearningly. "We\'d have to go out... "

Trillian · « **Reply #9 on:** July 25, 2007, 06:09:06 AM »

Ben breathed a small sound of laughter, then frowned while smiling.

"Shut up," he said, not unkindly, and pressed his hand firmly on the back of Kerr\'s head whilst straining his mouth up to meet Kerr\'s, pressing lips together and seeking out that tongue stud with his invading tongue between Kerr\'s lips.

He pulled his sire down upon him, so that he was resting comfortably on the bed instead of tensing upward to meet his mouth. With his shoulders and feet for leverage, he ground and writhed his hips beneath Kerr\'s, rubbing and prompting in a very obvious fashion, creating sparks and tingles for himself, hoping and knowing Kerr must be feeling the same.

He wanted more, he wanted it all, and right now it all felt like it could happen.

Existentially Odd · « **Reply #10 on:** July 25, 2007, 06:19:34 AM »

Kerr did. He also moved so that he was leaning on his elbows on either side of Ben\'s head, his hands wrapped around his fledgling\'s crown and fingers toying with his hair while he angled back to kiss him. The feeling of full body contact with a new, heated kiss to accompany it was electrifying and he was left mostly motionless while the sensations sparked through him.

Ben\'s hands were free and although Kerr was atop him, he was raised on his toes so that he wasn\'t squashing the blonde, giving him plenty of room to move, should he wish. Kerr himself found the kiss consuming and wondrous, unable to process all the fabulous feelings burgeoning in his mouth before another angle was found or a tongue prodded at his just so and he was amazed anew.

Somebody was making growling sounds of desire every now and then, emitting a low, curling rumble from the base of the throat that bespoke approval of everything currently happening but a need for more; he didn\'t realise it was him, not Ben.

Trillian · « **Reply #11 on:** July 25, 2007, 06:27:53 AM »

Somehow he\'d managed to get his hands at Kerr\'s sides, caressing up and down, over his back, following muscles and then scratching lightly, happy enough to keep himself wrapped up in the kiss and not minding if they didn\'t progress from here (for now, but he was looking forward to exploring more).

A little over a year, it had taken them that long to finally get together since they\'d first met early one April night at Risk, with Ben asking Kerr if he would like to sire him, that he would be a good fledgling. They\'d been separated, had misunderstandings, reunited, then they\'d shared blood, together but not really as Ben had flitted between Arles and Kerr, betrayals, abandonment, now together. It was about damn time, he thought as he wrapped possessive arms around Kerr\'s frame.

It had been a difficult beginning, that first night with suspicious looks and a painful confrontation, but it had ended well instead of badly this time, and now they were together, kissing, touching, loving

I love you, he thought, his eyes closed and his message not really projected to Kerr so much as projected outward, like he wanted the world to know - with his sire atop him though, there was no way Kerr would miss it.

Existentially Odd · « **Reply #12 on:** July 25, 2007, 06:32:28 AM »

Kerr was jolted, like he\'d been shocked and he pulled sharply back to look at Ben, breaking the kiss but not pulling away. His fledgling\'s eyes were closed and this disappointed Kerr, for he wanted to see the message there, as well as hear it.

Look at me, he begged mentally, tell me again.

Trillian · « **Reply #13 on:** July 25, 2007, 06:35:49 AM »

Ben\'s eyes opened and his icy blue gaze found Kerr, searching his stare as his own was studied.

"I love you," he said out loud, not wanting to repeat it mentally again, figuring if Kerr heard his voice, it might have more impact. He\'d wanted to let Kerr know, but without prompt, and now was as good a time as any, when he wanted to be with Kerr so completely, that he\'d fallen into a numb daze trying unsuccessfully to get over him.

Existentially Odd · « **Reply #14 on:** July 25, 2007, 06:46:37 AM »

Kerr looked back, smiling more broadly than he could ever remember smiling and happier than he ever knew he could be, too. His heart was a painful ache in his chest, but in the very best of ways; it was overfilled with returned love, tight with too many positive emotions so that it was threatening to burst apart and fill him with all these good things.

He\'d thought he might cry if he ever got those words out of Ben, but he didn\'t feel that way at all right now. He felt tight with happiness, stuffed to the brim with it and complete at last. No... not complete... fulfilled and substantial. He wouldn\'t be complete until this circle was closed and they could travel its dimensions without fear, back and forth in an unending pattern, with no possible deviations.

"I love you, too," he said quietly and leaned back in to kiss again, the conclusion to this decided, for him.

The way their mouths met and tongues duelled now... seemed different. Seemed slower, yet deeper, light but meaningful. Kerr didn\'t mind the sensation but something inside him was urgent and demanding now, and a loving kiss didn\'t satiate that hunger. He released Ben\'s mouth and began to move lower, nuzzling at his throat, scraping teeth across the sensitive flesh for effect. The more often he did this, the more primal became his instincts and he stopped thinking too much about their feelings and their connection - which had been a long time in coming - and surrendered himself to just feeling Ben, wanting to absorb his body into himself almost as much as he wanted to enter it.

Either way, he needed the consummation to confirm that he possessed this being and brand him as his own, at last.

Kerr trailed kisses over Ben\'s collar bone, moving off his elbows and toes and onto his knees as he shuffled down his fledgling\'s body, exploring candidly and curiously. He pressed his tongue stud to each nipple, enjoying flicking and tasting them as well, followed these actions with circling fingertips as his mouth downwards to taste ribs, hips, a belly button. He nuzzled where the trail of hair began and followed it down to Ben\'s erection, kissing up and down its surface with chaste lips. He ensured he knew the contour of every bit in this way, learning the veins and the dips, the ridges and the reactiveness of it before he moved anywhere near the top. Eventually he did, though, liking the bobbing against his cheek and nose but far more interested in getting his tongue involved.

He kissed the head with closed lips as well, then parted his mouth when it felt right and started tasting gently, stroking with his tongue tip so that the stud didn\'t come into play early. He was pacing himself as deliberately as he could - considering the feverish yearning that was writhing, low down in his belly - wanting to know the way of everything, before he progressed.

Trillian · « **Reply #15 on:** July 25, 2007, 07:12:03 AM »

Ben smiled at Kerr\'s returned declaration and felt much the same way about the kiss as the other vampire did, their blood bond connecting in a way that matched their souls - both of them wanting more, aching for fulfillment.

He watched Kerr\'s progress down his body, his reaching hands swiping up his sire\'s back, losing the distance he could touch with every move Kerr made to go lower. His hands found shoulders and then stroked Kerr\'s hair and face, fingertips gently exploring Kerr\'s jaw, cheek and temple as kisses upon his erection were made. Everything in his body was thrumming with anticipation and he was unable to remove his gaze from Kerr\'s progress eventually stroking Kerr\'s hair again, forcing himself not to manipulate Kerr\'s head in any way, wanting everything to happen how Kerr wanted it to - he was in charge of this act, Ben decided, though he couldn\'t stop himself from running fingers though Kerr\'s hair, massaging his scalp, his willpower immense to not take hold and drive.

Existentially Odd · « **Reply #16 on:** July 25, 2007, 07:20:30 AM »

Eventually, Kerr tired of exploring, for he knew enough and the coiled tension in Ben was only enhancing his desire to take. He gave up all pretense of gentleness without warning, switching from a gently prodding tongue and soft lips very suddenly to firm suction, a tight mouth and sliding up and down his beloved\'s length to its extremities. The primal lust lashing within him was only satisfied if he felt the depths of his throat stretched, and the stud in his tongue pressed to the most sensitive of nubs when he was kissing the tip.

He moved like this for... he didn\'t know how long - long enough to get Ben really reacting anyway - but he backed off when he sensed his love getting too close, not wanting it to end like this. Not this time, anyway. Kerr crawled back up Ben\'s body instead, expecting he would be able to lay atop him and kiss him again.

Trillian · « **Reply #17 on:** July 28, 2007, 06:52:37 AM »

As Kerr settled into a rhythm, so did Ben, pulling in breath and twitching his hips upwards with every downward stroke Kerr made, releasing breath heavily on the upwards, toes curling without his knowledge. The repeating machination of it was bringing Ben to his peak, but slowly, because the rhythm - though set at a firm pace - didn\'t change, and so Ben edged closer and closer to a point where he was making small sounds that he couldn\'t hold back, sighs and moans, the twitching becoming closer to a thrusting, and he could feel mounting pressure like a wad of iron between his legs... followed by a cry of tormented loss when Kerr removed his mouth and crawled up him. His groin was throbbing with how Kerr had left him and he softly groaned as his sire lay on him and began kissing him, for a couple of different reasons. Knowing that he would get his release and he had to be patient, Ben wrapped his arms around Kerr and kissed back heavily, tasting himself on Kerr\'s lips, still amazed that they were finally about to have sex together after so many things had kept them apart.

Existentially Odd · « **Reply #18 on:** July 28, 2007, 03:38:16 PM »

Enamoured by the kiss, Kerr was reaching mentally to extract the cannister of lubricant out of his bedside drawer, even while he reciprocated wholeheartedly Ben\'s response. The strain was enormous, the pressure intense, the need to reach the conclusion driving... all of it compounded by the fact that this was Ben he was with, raising him to new levels of awe with every moment that passed.

It was overwhelming, really, to be so involved in an act he\'d only recently re-discovered; he\'d never felt this much with anyone he\'d ever been with, never participated with his heart and soul as well as his body. He\'d never been in love, though, and hadn\'t had the opportunity to make love with someone he felt so strongly about - let alone someone he had a blood bond with, that fed him niggles of information without even seeking it, like a bite travelling along a fishing line.

He lifted himself off a little, the sounds his fledgling was making driving crazy with desire, and held his right hand out for the uncapped bottle floating beside him to tip a generous amount of silken liquid all over his fingers and palm. It made its way obediently back to his bedside chest of drawers while he squeezed his hand down between he and Ben, closing it first around the blonde\'s hardness, then his own, before prodding downward.

He was too turned on to be able to do it smoothly, unfortunately, too needy to be patient and get the lube back if he used up the handful he had by feeling around. Kerr therefore broke the kiss, his dark-eyed gaze glittering as he straightened and knelt up between Ben\'s thighs, glancing down to watch as he inserted a slick finger into his target. He pushed it in and out firmly but with relative slowness; once he squeezed a second in with it, his movements became slightly faster and less straight in an effort to stretch Ben to accommodate him, his gaze returning to the ice blue one at the head of the bed. He saw nothing there to discourage him and his heart welled again, just from the eye contact being made. He was so smitten, it was ridiculous, but it all felt so beautiful that he didn\'t even care.

He\'d been resting his left hand on his fledgling\'s right thigh while he prepared him, now he used that grip to steady him while he rose up and guided his erection into Ben\'s body with his other hand, pressing in slowly but determinedly - again, he was defeated by the power of this experience, the need to consume his beloved in every sense. He watched Ben\'s face, of course, for signs of intense discomfort, but was relentless in his hunger. Once positioned in fully, he did pause momentarily, gnawing on his tongue stud and just... watching Ben\'s expression adoringly.

When that moment had passed, he reached forward and pulled the blonde up into a sitting position, squatting over him. Kerr\'s knees parted a little more, to balance them both a bit better, and he sat on his heels as his left arm wrapped around Ben\'s back to grip his left shoulder and support him. His right hand was around the beautiful cock straining between them in no time and he stared hard at Ben, challenging him to take control of the movement while he grounded them and stroked him, holding the fledgling securely and needing to share this, rather than dominate it. He barely resisted the temptation to speak encouraging words into his fledgling\'s mind.

Trillian · « **Reply #19 on:** July 29, 2007, 11:05:50 PM »

Ben had been expecting some discomfort upon entry, for Kerr was a great deal larger than any of his past lovers, but his sire wasn\'t forceful or impatient, selfish or distracted. The pair of them worked in union to have Ben\'s body accept Kerr\'s, to have him prepared and relaxed enough to take in the man who he\'d waited so long for. Ben was grateful for Kerr\'s compassion and care, and so at each movement that had Kerr pushing further inside, there was pleasure as well, for Ben had time to adapt to him. There were words whispered by him as well, he could hear himself uttering things to Kerr about how he\'d been wanting, waiting, how good it was, how big he was, all sorts of statements that could remain unspoken but seemed right to say. Usually he wasn\'t a talker, but he needed to acknowledge Kerr\'s actions somehow. Once Kerr was all the way in, Ben had his head back, lips wettened with his tongue, feeling his lover in deep and liking the fact that they\'d moved well past discomfort and into the realm of pleasure. His eyelides fluttered and he looked down at Kerr before he lowered his face to meet his, capturing pressing and nibbling kisses upon Kerr\'s lips.

The new position was welcome, and Ben was on Kerr\'s wavelength enough to understand his sire\'s motivation for it. Pulling him up and into position had elicited a cry from him, a soft and growling cry that betrayed the bundle of pleasure he was receiving just from a single motion. As Kerr made himself a little more settled, Ben started to move, rocking slowly and lightly at first, holding onto Kerr for support as he began the age old act of sexual gratification, and then building up a welcome rhythm that had them both thrusting and grunting with effort. The slick sounds of their sex were spurring Ben on as was the wet smell of the lubrication, both overpowered by Kerr\'s smell and sounds, which had Ben lost. It was nice to be lost with Kerr, it was nice to give himself completely to someone who he could trust to take care of him, who wouldn\'t be selfish, who would gratify him and look after him as best as he was able.

"Can\'t.... last," Ben warned after many minutes of rhythmic, pounding sex. Being taken so close to orgasm by Kerr\'s mouth had his stamina altered now, and as he held on tight to his lover, pressing his forehead to Kerr\'s shoulder, he knew he was close, and mentally sent out wave after wave of the pleasure he was receiving with every downward thrust of Kerr inside him, which also relayed his weak-legged position - he wouldn\'t be able to last much longer in all sorts of ways - Kerr would have to take over, or have them both grind to a halt as Ben reached his peak.

Existentially Odd · « **Reply #20 on:** July 30, 2007, 12:38:23 AM »

Automatically, Kerr responded by leaning forward and laying Ben on his back once more, remaining on his knees and taking over the cadence that his fledgling had them both thrumming to. His arms and hands stayed where they were - which might have been uncomfortable for the blonde, with an arm beneath him, still gripping his shoulder, but Kerr was beyond noticing - holding tightly, stroking and caressing, unwilling to be separated by even the slightest amount.

The only thing that did change was that he sought Ben\'s mouth and, though his body was consumed by the daze of his fledgling\'s feelings of passion and arousal blending seamlessly with - and intensifyng - his own, he kissed him tenderly while the tightness in his groin gathered, throbbed and finally burst as he came with him. There was nothing premeditated about it, beyond the fact that he was a slave to Ben\'s greater readiness and he held nothing back in an effort to flow with him, when it happened, there was just... bliss.

Never.

The only word that came to him as his hips pistoned and he spilled in blinding, powerful gushes into his beloved, was a negative. There was nothing negative about the experience, though, it was just that he\'d never felt anything so intense, so beautiful, so blinding. Never had he been catapulted into the stratosphere like a bullet expelled, experiencing for the first time what it was to touch the heavens as he reached a climax so strong it felt like his body was shredded with the crystals of his pleasure, torn asunder and scattered like pinpricks of light, allowing him no more substance as he reached some higher plane of satisfaction.

Never had he been such a part of someone that a primitive act of melding flesh, tingling extremities and guttural noises conveyed him beyond everything substantial and left him... complete and perfect, as he remembered the feel of the sun upon his face to be as a mortal... only this was a million times more perfect. Ben was his sun and everything he would ever need to sustain him, to flourish with.

Eventually, Kerr came back to himself; realised that he was holding Ben in a death grip and likely squashing him to boot, all in an effort to squeeze his body into his own, if he possibly could. He rolled sluggishly over onto his own back (with as much care as he could show, considering Ben\'s legs were wrapped around him and could be snapped if he wasn\'t cautious) and loosened his grip slightly - though he still held his fledgling in place, on top of him. He allowed the kiss to break so that he could speak, finding that opening his eyes was a very difficult thing, for he was lost in the visions of the light that was their union, behind his eyelids, and he was loathe to let them go, even to gaze on the one he loved.

"I love you," he breathed reverently, right hand finally stopping its stroking on Ben\'s flagging erection (and he hadn\'t even noticed he\'d been doing that still) to skim up his body and wrap around him in a hug, while his left hand cupped the blonde\'s face, as if steadying it so he could focus on it while he spoke. "Holy shit... if it\'s going to be like that every time... I\'m glad I\'m already dead, because I think I just about imploded... fuck... that was amazing," he blinked, his voice low and humbled with awe. It was stupid to say - part of him was aware of that - but he couldn\'t help it. He wanted to know that his soulmate had felt the mind-rending rapture too.

Trillian · « **Reply #21 on:** July 30, 2007, 06:29:54 AM »

Ben was smiling in a way he hadn\'t in a long time, without self-consciousness, with genuine joy, all these good feelings and emotions bubbling and bouyant in his chest, splitting his lips in a broad smile and shining in his eyes. "Was brilliant," he agreed, understating it somewhat. Ben\'s hands were caressing Kerr\'s flesh gently, wherever it was easy for him to touch which happened to be the side of his face and into his hair, mirroring the way Kerr was holding him, and the other hand upon Kerr\'s shoulder on the other side. He brushed his lips upon Kerr\'s skin as well before lifting his face and going for the underside of his sire\'s jaw. It was all very dreamy and cosy. "Could stay with you inside me forever," he murmured, though he could feel that Kerr would soon be slipping out of him. He was loathe to lose him though, so was quite still atop the man that he\'d desired as a lover for longer than any other.

Existentially Odd · « **Reply #22 on:** July 30, 2007, 06:41:15 AM »

Kerr chuckled and tilted his head to allow the kisses better access, basking in an afterglow he felt might go on forever. "Well, it\'s not that I\'m unwilling but... think we\'ll just have to settle with being together forever," he advised with another giggle, "and take turns at the being inside bit."

He knew forever was a long time. He knew emotions soured and twisted after far shorter times than forever. Right then, he didn\'t want to think about this ever ending and he didn\'t care that his boasts might not come to pass because they changed or grew apart or simply fell out of love. For now, there was love and wonder and passion enough for the two of them to light up the city with their energy, it felt like, and that was all that mattered to Kerr.

He hugged Ben close, the stickiness of his right hand more obvious now that he\'d floated back to earth (and time had passed to dry the wetnesses on it). "Shower?" he proposed huskily, doing his best to look into Ben\'s eyes.

Trillian · « **Reply #23 on:** July 30, 2007, 06:56:09 AM »

Take turns? Really? Ben hadn\'t expected that. Of course most of his other lovers he\'d experienced both sides of the sex with them, but Declan had been very dominantly inside of him and he thought that had been a controlling thing (and only letting Ben take the other position when Declan had got the urge, he thought), and Arles had certainly never swapped with him, and Ben hadn\'t bothered suggesting because they\'d never discussed their sex, they\'d just slept together and every so often they\'d fuck. Lazarus had told him that certain positions and sexual offerings were beneath him - letting someone inside him was not an option, Lazarus had said, as it was a trust position, and he wouldn\'t get on his knees and/or suck anyone, for it was a worship position. Ben had laughed at him, but could kind of see his point.

Now Kerr was surprising him with being open about things they would do in the future, and offering to exchange the roles. He hadn\'t thought that Kerr would want to, considering his history of being straight. He would\'ve believed that he would be more comfortable giving rather than receiving, and maybe come around much later. Maybe he\'d let Ichabod do it to him, to see what it was like, and he\'d liked it.

Frowning for a moment before pushing such thoughts away so he could focus on the happy, he agreed that a shower was good, and outlined why. "Yes, a shower. I just have to peel myself off you first," he said with a grin, and shifted away and then off Kerr, feeling not only the stickiness between them break, but also losing Kerr out of his body and feeling a bit strange without him. It was a short walk to the bathroom, and Ben made sure to hold his sire\'s hand and take him inside the tiled room, not bearing to lose contact with him just yet.

Existentially Odd · « **Reply #24 on:** July 30, 2007, 07:16:18 AM »

Kerr gave quite a childish whimper at the prospect of Ben peeling himself off him, quickly followed by a grin that showed he was joking (though he found he couldn\'t bear to break contact, either). He allowed himself to be led into the bathroom and turned on the shower that Ben didn\'t, positioning the heads so that they met in the middle a lot more than usual, surrounding the two of them with warm spray and suiting his indulgent mood perfectly.

They washed one another, smiled a lot and kissed occasionally, exploring each other\'s bodies from different perspectives. Kerr wasn\'t sure Ben would like him using the soap to wash his seed out of his ass, but he made a few experimental swipes that hinted at his intentions and followed his fledgling\'s apparent wishes from there. Personally, he couldn\'t have cared if Ben stuck a finger in every crevice in his body, but he didn\'t have the modesty issues his beloved did.

Pondering such shyness - in one who had a perfect body, as far as he was concerned - brought him to thinking on his own, glancing with interest at his upper arms, as if he\'d forgotten he was heavily tattooed. He decided he wanted Ben\'s name decorating his body as well - at least once, but he could immediately think of a few ways of incorporating him - but he didn\'t know how that would happen. He was fairly certain he\'d seen advertising for supernatural tattooing on the community board at Risk, but he wasn\'t about to go there and look at it now. Or... for a while, yet. It was something to keep in mind, though, for next time he was there.

He watched Ben through worshipful eyes as they dried (after finally dragging themselves out from under the siilken hot water, squeaky clean and acquainted in even more ways), missing the feel of the blonde pressed against him like a physical ache and thinking how stupid that was. They had to get dry, for fuck\'s sake. "You\'re so beautiful," he murmured adoringly, hardly aware he\'d spoken the words aloud, for they\'d been ricocheting around his head since they\'d started showering. "I won\'t cope if you leave me again," he sighed, then blinked, because he hadn\'t meant to broach such a subject now.

It wasn\'t true, of course, for he likely would, but considering the fullness of his heart at that particular moment, it certainly felt like it would shatter and he\'d want to die if he was forced to endure any kind of separation from Ben in the near future. A slight blush of embarrassment tinged his cheeks and he looked down hastily, as if he desperately needed to watch the towel he was holding dry down his left leg.

Trillian · « **Reply #25 on:** July 30, 2007, 07:27:10 AM »

First he smiled at the compliment but then Kerr went on to say more. Ben felt like he\'d been slapped at the words used. Guilt and shame washed through him and he worked on making his frown disappear before looking over at Kerr, who was looking down at himself and at his towel. The warm happy feelings had melted away quite starkly and Ben shifted his gaze away, back to his own towel which he busied drying himself with, not wanting to say anything after Kerr had said that. Why? Why say such a thing now and break their moment together? Why remind Ben of their pain-filled past at the cusp of their future?

Feeling small and worthless, Ben struggled to hide his emotions away and finally won when a sensation of numbness blanketed over him and he could feel his face becoming expressionless, watchful, masking. It was easier to towel himself dry now, to focus on that and nothing else, and soon he had it hanging damp on the rung to dry. No longer did he need to seek out Kerr\'s closeness, though a part of him was aching through the shield he\'d thrown up, after he\'d given and shared so much of himself. It wasn\'t easy to hide anymore.

Existentially Odd · « **Reply #26 on:** July 30, 2007, 07:38:12 AM »

Where there\'d been softness and welcome, there was now harsh rejection and ignorance. Where he\'d felt connected to Ben and swathed in his love, there was now only a void for Kerr and he mourned the sudden change immediately, knowing he\'d instigated it and hating it, even though it confused him.

He looked up at Ben and wondered why what he\'d confessed had caused such a vicious reaction; the blonde\'s body language bespoke awkwardness and his eyes were as closed off as his mind was as he looked anywhere but at Kerr. Was he planning to leave, after all?

Panicking, he strode forward and embraced Ben - holding him tenderly but with firm arms around his back, as if the fledgling was fixing to race out of the bathroom and out of his life in that instant - and peered down into his eyes. "I\'m sorry," he whispered, "please... I... didn\'t know that was wrong to say, I... I\'m sorry," he said lamely, wanting to fix it and not sure how.

Trillian · « **Reply #27 on:** July 30, 2007, 03:35:33 PM »

Once numb he couldn\'t undo it so easily. His actions were what he hoped spoke for him, because if he said anything now he knew that his tone would be hurtful and his words would likely come out snide - a defense mechanism that he understood about himself and didn\'t want to fall on now. There was no point hurting further, not if he could keep it inside himself and just deal with it. Why prolong the agony by hurting back? He was at least above that now.

He allowed Kerr\'s hold and nuzzled his face against his chest, making a soft \'hmmm\' sound that he hoped would comfort his sire. His arms went around him, trying to recapture that soft moment, though he felt hard and cold suddenly - and it was both of them, because they were undead, yet somehow they\'d been warm and soft before. Funny how perspective could change things.

"Hungry," he said finally, hoping that the thirst deep within him would distract Kerr from discussing this further. It was their dark morning, and Ben\'s thirst always flared up in a breakfast kind of way, plus their activity had him needing more than just a distraction - the blood lust was real.

Existentially Odd · « **Reply #28 on:** July 31, 2007, 06:39:00 AM »

"I know," Kerr said sadly, soothingly. He squeezed Ben extra tightly for a moment and then released him in order to take his hand to walk out of the bathroom. It was a short trip to the wardrobe, where contact was surrendered again so they could dress, and the elder specifically held his tongue. He knew it was he that had caused the sudden rift and that he alone should fix it, but he\'d been too daft in the first place to know not to speak and now he didn\'t understand what the consequences meant.

There was nothing for it but to remain close and think on it, until he\'d come up with a reasonable understanding of why his words had hurt, instead of professed in example the depth of love he felt - as intended.

After they both had clothes on they left the apartment and travelled down to the street to find some sustenance. Although Kerr usually chose victims for Ben without the blonde\'s input, tonight he was interested in restoring the peace. He wanted to do something to make up for his faux pas but he simply wasn\'t sure what. Would Ben accept something as corny as a gift, that showed how much he cared and was sorry - did he like flowers?

The easiest thing to do, for a start, was ask for his feelings on dinner; romantic gestures could come afterward (he hoped). "Did you... like the look of anyone in particular?" he asked quietly as they strolled down the street. The reality of them as a couple was far more glaring out here, to Kerr, for he felt very much changed by what he\'d experienced with Ben and just wanted to envelope the blonde in his grasp... in his arms... kiss him and caress him as they walked... prove that they\'d become completely part of one another.

Except he wasn\'t game. He\'d ruined it, by talking about Ben leaving, which... meant what? His lover had thought he was criticising his leaving? Had retreated from him because he felt judged? Or perhaps it had something to do with Lazarus, something Kerr didn\'t know yet (and likely wouldn\'t want to). The more he thought on it, the more he felt the former notion the more likely, for Ben had acted as if Kerr had accused him of something heinous, which was far from the case. He understood Ben\'s need to leave - now - even if he didn\'t like the fact that he\'d taken up with the Ancient and become involved with...

Kerr still couldn\'t think on it easily, and didn\'t want to think of Ben like that at all. Maybe that was part of his fledgling\'s reaction as well - he was sorry? That would be good; if Ben wasn\'t sorry for spending all the time with Lazarus that he had

fucking... bet he fucked him just like he just fucked you
How often?
Every night
nooo... Lazarus fucked dead bodies every night. Maybe they didn\'t even, at all.
One way to find out... only one

then Kerr had a lot more to worry about than one moment of badly-judged commenting on his part. Of course, he wasn\'t planning on bringing the man up for a long, long time and definitely not until they were settled enough that a simple comment about Ben choosing to leave him went unnoticed.

Feeling apologetic and in need of a little reassurance, the Irishman reached out to press the palm of his hand to the small of Ben\'s back, rubbing slightly as he looked down at stunning light blue eyes and waited for his answer. He intended to nab his fledgling two large men tonight, so that he would have plenty to drink and his equilibrium might be restored.

Of course, Ben didn\'t really need two burly victims and the second would likely be barely touched... but that stirred a notion in Kerr that surprised him and he wondered if he should... no, it was silly. Right? Although... him drinking through Ben while Ben drank from the second logically meant that Kerr got something to drink, as well as fed from his beloved, like he had in the old days. Would that even work now? He was desperate enough to bring their closeness back that he was willing to try it, for if it was anything like it had once been, the intimacy of feeding from Ben would be akin to the sex they\'d just had and have his fledgling pliant in his arms once more.

Well, he could hope, anyway - and also put some faith in the belief that it was the romantic gesture he was looking for, as well. "Or shall I just choose for you?" he asked now, licking his lips as he glanced at Ben\'s - not as red, without blood inside him - and fidgetted a little. He was eager suddenly, to see if his plan might work, and adjusted the untucked lower half of the sky blue dress shirt he was wearing over his black slacks for something to do with the hand not touching Ben - the shirt sat elegantly on him, as usual, and didn\'t and certainly need such fiddlings, but it was a way to process his nervousness without being too obvious. He thought.

Trillian · « **Reply #29 on:** July 31, 2007, 06:55:12 AM »

Ben was grateful that Kerr simply accepted the embrace as an acceptance of the sorry, because he didn\'t think he had it in him to talk about it, and Kerr had always been about talk. Lately, since Ben had been with him after they\'d met up again, Kerr hadn\'t said much at all, focussing instead on the present, and it was working out nicely. It added to Ben\'s fuel of leaving the past behind - there was a history of desire between them, that was about all they needed to acknowledge.

He dressed in faded bluejeans and a button-up dark green shirt, not quite matching the way Kerr could look so elegant in clothes, but perhaps that was the fault of his sneakers. Whatever the case, he commented softly on how good Kerr looked but couldn\'t quite drum up a smile for his sire.

When they walked down the street he\'d wanted to reach for Kerr\'s hand but in his state he didn\'t know how to - reaching across the chasm of space between them to grip it just seemed impossible, but he didn\'t shift away from Kerr\'s touch once it was felt upon his back. With Kerr\'s question of whether anyone was standing out to Ben, he didn\'t even bother to look around, he merely shook his head and allowed Kerr to choose. He figured that Kerr was better at picking people anyway, and making them compliant. He didn\'t have the desire to pull in his own food - for it had worked best when he was on his own anyway, and he was a little worried about what Kerr might think about the way he did it because he had to seduce with a sleazey promise instead of mentally dominate.

Existentially Odd · « **Reply #30 on:** July 31, 2007, 07:19:47 AM »

As he\'d expected, the sire chose prey for his fledgling, walking with him until they saw what he was looking for; a robust man in a business suit. Kerr convinced him to check out the alley he was passing and when he and Ben entered a few moments after, no-one noticed.

Kerr was a little worried about how hungry Ben might be - though he needed to learn to judge, he supposed, for he intended them to wake up with each other in much the same fashion from now on (and didn\'t that thought settle a rosy inner glow low down in his belly?). It was therefore best he learn Ben\'s hunger levels after expending copious amounts of energy now. He just didn\'t want the mortal the blonde fed from hurt, so he monitored the feeding carefully.

"I\'ll get you another," he assured his love as the first ended smoothly, smiling as Ben nodded and leaned against the wall to wait. Kerr exited behind the business man and stood at the corner of the alley, scanning the street. He stood there for perhaps two minutes before he saw what he wanted - a tradesman with golden hair and tanned skin exiting the building across the road and packing up his truck after a day\'s work. He was whistling cheerfully - no doubt because he was only winding up now and would earn a good bonus for putting in extra hours, this late into the evening - and it was that noise which initially caught Kerr\'s attention.

He had to step forward a little so that the tradesman was within his sphere of influence, for the road in front of his apartment building was six lanes wide, but soon enough the sun-kissed man was watching the traffic and then jogging across to him, almost as if he\'d spied a friend and was happy enough to deviate from his actions to go and have a quick chat. Indeed, his smile was still in place as he walked up to Kerr and the vampire turned to walk at his side into the alleyway. He was as tall and broad as Kerr, though fair in colouring and a couple of years older than he\'d been when he was turned, but his cheery demeanour and athletic physique appealed greatly to Kerr and he hoped Ben would like him, too.

When they reached the fledgling, Kerr left the mortal standing towards the centre of the truck-width space they were in, so that Ben would have to go to him. That would leave Kerr to move in behind his fledgling, grasp his hips and kiss the back of his neck as he fed... until his lips moved around to the side and he bit, of course. He just hoped that he would be able to keep such a wound in Ben open and get some of the blood he\'d consumed out - along with the wish that it woud be a pleasurable experience for his lover, of course. He\'d be fucked if it was an annoyance, or hurt... but it was a risk he\'d decided he\'d take.

Trillian · « **Reply #31 on:** July 31, 2007, 07:33:33 AM »

Not knowing why Kerr hadn\'t brought the second man over like he had the first, Ben didn\'t think anything of moving from the wall he was leaning against and going over to his second victim. This fellow was a little taller than the other, and Ben had to step in close and bite upwards, exposing his own neck and throat in the process, which was an animal instinct not to, but primally he had his protector so once again thought nothing of it.

His eyes were half-closed when Kerr came in behind him, the touch had his eyes opening slightly as he continued to drink, but settled again when Kerr began to kiss his nape, sending shivers of pleasure down his spine as he fed. Ben murmured his agreeable consent and could feel himself responding while pressed up against the warm-bodied workman.

Kerr worked his way around to Ben\'s exposed throat while Ben\'s eyes fluttered all the way closed so he could pay more attention to the sensations of his lover at his back and warmth and compliance in front of him.

Then came the bite upon his own neck and Ben paused in his drinking, not really understanding what was going on, why Kerr would bite him, but old memories riding to the surface held him in check and his hands - holding the muscled arms of the tradesman - squeezed slightly until the familiar sensation of being drunk from began to run through him. It wasn\'t as total as when he\'d been mortal but there was a more savage connection at feeding and being fed from, with a lot more nuances and awareness because he was fledgling.

A hand floated away from the workman and moved up to find and grip Kerr\'s hair. Not to pull him away, but to hold him in place. Throaty sounds as Ben fed were akin to what Kerr had heard not long before in bed, and Ben was grinding between the two - his victim and his sire - as he drank. Kerr\'s worry about keeping the wound open wasn\'t applicable, for Ben healed much slower than someone of Kerr\'s age. Faster than a human, but still slow enough that the bloodflow wouldn\'t trickle to a stop anytime soon.

He drank shallowly, to have it last, but eventually there was only so much he would take from the workman, and had to close the wound with his own blood, holding his tongue over it until it healed, feeling his own blood eeping out and into Kerr at his throat. He wondered what he tasted like, if his blood was the same or like a mixed blend. His siring had mixed his blood up anyway, and he hoped that Kerr liked it - for he certainly liked having his sire there again.

"Kerr," he said, the name filled with emotion, the numbness completely gone from him for it was impossible to remain impassive in this kind of sharing.

Existentially Odd · « **Reply #32 on:** July 31, 2007, 07:46:12 AM »

"Yes, love?" Kerr murmured innocently, lapping at the closing wound in his fledgling\'s throat - damn, it was actually very cool to have someone who could heal a wound independently, for he didn\'t have to worry at all about spillage - while the mortal he\'d been feeding from wandered congenially away.

His arms were wrapped about Ben\'s middle, his body pressed tightly up against the blonde\'s, enjoying every move the teenager made as his hands pressed possessively to the hard muscles of his chest and stomach. It had worked better than Kerr had expected... and had some stirring effects he definitely hadn\'t anticipated but which he was sincerely grateful for, now.

Trillian · « **Reply #33 on:** July 31, 2007, 08:00:32 AM »

"I won\'t leave you again," he promised, wondering if Kerr would turn him around and make him say it once more, like he had when Ben had spoken of love and not been looking at him.

There was no point to leaving, unless of course Kerr did something so horrendous that Ben couldn\'t bear to stay, but he didn\'t expect Kerr to do such a thing. It might\'ve been egotistical to think his sire would move the world (or try to) in order to keep him, but Ben was picking up on vibes that Kerr was emitting - that he wanted to please Ben, that he wanted Ben to stay. Like Kerr, Ben didn\'t believe in forever, but right now he believed they\'d be together for so long that it would feel like forever, and that was good enough for now.

Existentially Odd · « **Reply #34 on:** July 31, 2007, 02:03:36 PM »

Kerr did turn Ben, but not so that he could ask him to repeat his words - he simply wanted to look at him while he processed such a promise... words that seemed to take a while to settle into him, like a feather drifting to earth at gravity\'s whim, until they nestled deep inside. He covetted them and his smile as he gazed adoringly at Ben declared this; he cupped the blonde\'s face and nodded, swallowing and not trusting himself to speak at that moment.

Leaning forward, Kerr pressed his mouth gently to Ben\'s, fitting himself between lips warmed and coloured by a recent feeding, that contoured perfectly to his own, it seemed. After a few soft kisses he pulled back and nodded again, his eyes shining with the strength of the emotions swelling within him, thumb still stroking Ben\'s cheek.

He wouldn\'t leave again, the words sincere and - well, not entirely unprompted but certainly volunteered. Maybe they would talk now, about everything they were avoiding, but Kerr still didn\'t feel compelled to do so. Still not ready for the answers he\'d get, he was at least reassured by the promise he\'d just received, believing that when they finally did start talking, he had a measure of safety available to him; Ben had said he wouldn\'t go, the implication being no matter what transpired between them (unless it was inconceivably heinous, of course).

Finally, Kerr\'s hand dropped to hold Ben\'s and, with a final nod, he led his lover out of the alley, planning to take him back up to the apartment and hold him close some more. Planning to take him home.