Carbon Copy

[Trillian]

reserved for pinkroses

WANTED:
Male Aspect Shifter for discreet get-togethers
Contact 0409 555 454

HE'D BOUGHT A BURNER PHONE specially for the advert.  It wasn't like he was going to advertise his own cellphone, he might get hassled and he wanted to keep his cellphone number, he'd had it for years and he liked it.  So he'd bought the burner phone and placed the ad, paying for it with a money order because he didn't want it traced back to him in case somebody did a little investigating.  He'd expected some freaks to call, but he hadn't expected silence.  It was disheartening, that a blatent request such as what he'd put had attracted nothing.  He'd begun to wonder if he should've offered money, but a week after placing the ad he got a call.  He wasn't expecting it, he'd almost forgotten about the phone (except he took it everywhere with him).  He'd been out shopping for clothes, looking at the spring and summer fashion lines that were hitting the stores now, even though it was still cold enough for most people to wear coats, jumpers and jackets.  Even scarves and gloves, still.

He'd answered it, sounding a lot calmer than he felt.  This wasn't the normal kind of thing for him to be doing, and he wasn't sure he was going to go through with it anyway.  Blatent or not, a get-together didn't imply sex, he just wanted to meet.  But in case things fell into place, and everything turned out exactly like he wanted, maybe he would want to be intimate - and maybe they would too.

"Hello?"  There was a silence at the other end, but he could hear breathing.  Not the heavy kind, just normal breathing.  "I haven't had anybody call about the ad, I... was losing hope."

This was the right thing to say, because his caller had started speaking then.  The details were vague, and names weren't given, though there was a place, time and date now.  When the date rolled around, he felt excited and nervous and sick.  He'd driven to the location with the sensation of cotton wool in his mouth.  He'd dressed nicely, as if for a date.  He rented a room at the foyer, giving his real name and handing over his I.D. because he had no other option.  It didn't matter at this stage - this place seemed anonymous enough.  And nice.

He went up to his room and walked around it, not really seeing the plush furniture or classy accessories.  He was waiting because he was early.  When his phone rang - the burner phone - he gave his room number over and waited some more.  He'd thought he knew anxiety before, but now he was so anxious he felt like a caged animal, pacing the room until there was a door knock.  Ben went over to it and pulled it open to see who was on the other side - not that it mattered what he looked like, not to begin with, anyway.

[pinkroses]

At several points tonight he’d thought about turning back, getting on the bus, walking into the foyer, even after he’d been given the room number – the corridor was long enough that he could have gone straight past the room and headed back downstairs and he had considered it. But he’d found himself knocking and when the door opened to show the handsome blonde on the other side it was too late to go back. He’d come this far, he knew he’d regret it if he didn’t find out what he was here for. Besides, who knew what he might get out of it? Cash, maybe. Or just a memorable experience. Anything to get out of the monotony his life was in danger of falling into.

His hair was dark, almost black, but there were a few lighter shades where the sun had lightened it. It was a couple of inches long, styled with a little gel, but for the most part looked soft and slightly fluffy from having been recently washed. His skin was sunkissed, although not all that much of it was on view at the moment as he was wearing jeans and a checked shirt made of thicker material than a dress shirt – but it was open at the collar and the sleeves rolled up to his forearms. His clothes fitted his slim form well, showing hints of the muscles underneath in the shape of his shoulders and chest. A black leather jacket was hooked over one arm and he shifted it to his left arm as his bright green eyes drifted over the young man in front of him. He was a couple of inches taller than the blonde and appeared a few years older. He couldn’t help thinking at first that he could probably take him in a fight it anything went wrong here. But Hell, he knew enough about the different things out there to be aware that there may well be more to this kid than there seemed.

Matt hadn’t really known what to expect from tonight, the advert had made it sound like a woman to him, so when a man had answered his call he’d been a little taken aback. Not enough to just put down the phone though and advertiser’s words had kept him on the line. It didn’t sound like whatever he was planning was dangerous – although Matt guessed he couldn’t really tell that just from the sound of a stranger’s voice. Someone planning a robbery who needed an aspect shifter probably wouldn’t be able to give up hope though. They would know where else to look and probably wouldn’t have advertised in the press. After speaking on the phone the first time Matt had tried to stop his imagination from running wild – assuming things usually just got you into trouble, or made you look like an idiot when it turned out to be something completely different. Best just to go in with no expectations.

“Hi there,” Matt said in a deep voice, taking half a step forwards. He didn’t lift his hand to offer to shake, but now his hand was free of his jacket he would accept if one was offered to him. He felt like he should give his name – but that hadn’t been mentioned on the phone and it all seemed so secretive. Perhaps a part of not talking about this meeting was not knowing too much which could be told. He would follow the lead he was given on that, as with most of this since he didn't even know why he was here.

[Trillian]

Ben noticed the surprise on the other's face, and guessed incorrectly that he'd been recognised.  Either as Kerr's fledge (political recognition) or through his extremely brief but highly successful modelling career (fashion recognition).  He took the opportunity of the delay while the other guy was checking him out, to take in what he'd attracted: the guy was taller than him (very good), and built (also very good), his hair was dark (exceptional, because Ben remembered reading an article that aspect shifters couldn't change their hair or eye colour) though a little long, and his eyes were an extremely vibrant green (bad, but nothing contacts couldn't fix).  It really didn't matter what he looked like facially, because it was irrelevant.  Ben barely saw him, he was too busy thinking about who he could become.

"Hi," Ben replied, and also didn't offer a hand to shake because it felt too formal and detached, but he took a step back and to the side to allow the shifter entry into the room.  It was an impressive room, Ben had wanted to spare no expense in order to appeal to the stranger's tastes.  There was a possibility that it might be intimidating, but fuck it, things would be easier on him if this guy was a pro.  He didn't think he was though, there was something very casual about him.  Wouldn't someone who made a living out of providing intimate services be more professional and aggressive about claiming their space?  "Come in, take a seat," he invited.  "I'm Ben," he introduced himself, and it had been something he'd deliberated over for a long while, whether or not to supply his name.  He figured it was a common enough name, and he'd just leave out his surname.  There was a chance he was already recognised anyway, so why make a fool out of himself?

[pinkroses]

Matt stepped into the room, glancing around at their surroundings and trying to hide the admiration from his face. He’d never been into the Warwick and whilst he had enough money to get by there wasn’t enough (or a good reason) for him to come to a place this expensive and luxurious.

“Thanks,” he said,making himself pay attention to the blonde – Ben – as the introductions were made and he turned his gaze away from admiring the room to look at the person who had placed the advert. “Ben, it’s nice t’meet you. I’m Matt,” he said, heading for the seating area, but half turned to face Ben as he walked. He didn’t recognise Ben, he’d never had much to do with the Oligarchy when it had been in control of the city, but he’d heard about the changes, in the same way as he’d seen Ben’s advert. He was interested, but not involved enough to recognise people related to those in control.

Well, someone looking to hire someone for a dodgy job probably wouldn’t have paid for somewhere this swanky to meet it – that would be more of a back alley kind of thing most likely. But Ben wasn’t throwing himself on him either – not yet anyway. Obviously. He’d requested an aspect shifter, if this was going down the more seductive route he probably had a picture in his mind of the person he wanted. Matt had turned into plenty of people he knew, or pictures he’d seen, but only once for a more intimate reason. He had heard plenty of tales from his cousin who earned a living that way but it had never appealed to him before. Yet he was here now, knowing very well this might head in that direction.

Matt laid his jacket over an arm of the small sofa and took a seat, leaning back against the comfortable cushions with his knees spread in a casual pose. But it wasn’t really posing – Matt didn’t feel uncomfortable even though he wasn’t sure what was in store for him tonight. He was looking forward to it, whatever it might be.

“So how can I help you, Ben?” he asked with a polite smile at the young looking man. What was the point in dancing around the issue? He was curious to know what Ben had in mind for tonight.

[Trillian]

Ben closed the door gently after Matt entered, and pressed his back to the door for a moment to take a breath.  Being a vampire meant it wasn't necessry for his life, but it was necessary for his sanity.  He pulled it in, held it, then released it slowly to calm himself.  There was a twisting in his gut that was likely replacing the sensation of a rapidly beating heart.  Still, it felt like his chest was ready to explode, so obviously the cause of that sensation wasn't limited to the rhythmic pulsing of muscle.  To be completely horrid, it was like feeling a burp rise that would never come.  The sensation wasn't pleasant, and he was hoping that calming down would help him be rid of it.

He was aware they hadn't yet touched.  He could hear Matt's heartbeat filling the room.  Maybe that was why he was thinking of heartbeats and peculiar bodily functions.  He followed the shifter cautiously, not wanting to spook him.  It felt a bit like he was following a deer.  He wasn't the hunter in this scenario - not at all - but he could be perceived that way.  The advert had been in a magazine for supernaturals, after all, so it wasn't like this guy was stumbling into anything without knowing the dangers that existed.  Ben wasn't a threat to him, and he wanted to present that face.  He didn't want to drink from him, this was not his intention.  He'd been a little disappointed to answer the door to a breather - a vampiric aspect shifter would've been fucking awesome, and he'd even dared to dream, but he'd not been so stupid as to put it in his advert and limit his options.  He was lucky enough to attract Matt, after all.  One and only response, and he was a pretty good one.

With his mind spinning madly and heading in a hundred different directions at once, he watched Matt place his jacket down and then sit looking relaxed and unbothered.  His pose fooled Ben, who also relaxed in return, pleased that the shifter wasn't skittish.  Mind, he didn't know Ben was a vampire yet.  Maybe.  Ben's eyes did tend to give him away.  He'd started shopping around for contacts for himself, to not stand out quite so much.  He'd attracted quite a few stares when he'd gone clothes shopping, and heard a few whispers from people to their friends or relatives about his eyes.  Always complimentary, but that was hardly the point.

When he was asked how he could be helped, Ben's gaze flicked over to the laptop case he'd brought to the hotel with him.  In it was his laptop, filled with photographs of Kerr.  There was also a document wallet that held printed photos of Kerr, in case Matt had to study them in order to perfect them.  This implied there would be more than one meeting, and he really should feel this guy out a little, regardless of whether he wanted to get to business or not.  Ben had also brought along a huge wad of cash, stuffed into the laptop case in an inside pocket.  Just in case this guy happened to be playing the part of a (male) ingenue and dropped it as soon as he realised he could collect a fee for doing Ben this favour.

He sat down on the sofa beside Matt, but in such a way as not to crowd him.  They weren't touching but could do so easily.  It was only now that Ben really saw the shifter's face and realised Matt was a good looking guy in his own right.  If you liked that sort of characterisation.  Nobody looked ugly to Ben anymore, he realised.  Not even those hideous creatures he saw skulking around in Risk, or those who would likely skulk around in Venture.  They were monstrous, but they weren't ugly.  When did that happen? he wondered.  It didn't matter.  His tolerance had never been about looks, but about sentiment.  People were either for him or against him.  He hoped Matt just cared about money.  Things would be so much easier that way - yet colder, detached.  It would depend on how well Matt could sell it. His voice was really nice and deep, but it wasn't Kerr's.

"I'm sure you can guess I want you to look like someone for me," he said, and waited for acknowledgement from Matt, however brief.  "He's dead now, but I miss him.  And... and I just want to look at him again.  Tell him what I didn't tell him before he died, maybe," he said, though he had no speech planned.  "I have photos?" he said, and his statement came out sounding like a question.  Did Matt want to see them, or did he have questions to ask?

[pinkroses]

Matt waited patiently for Ben to join him, then twisted a little in his seat so that he was facing him a little more. Although Ben had taken in those deep breaths by the door Matt was aware of how quiet it was after the bustle of the streets of the city. This room shut out the sirens and traffic, leaving just them and the unnatural stillness.

He silver eyes were attractive and gave away that Ben wasn’t human, even if his stillness didn’t. Matt had guessed he wasn’t going to be meeting a human – although there were humans who knew about all sorts of creatures, one of them could have placed an advert with the right connections.

He gave a small nod as Ben explained that he wanted him to look like someone, he would have had to have been an idiot not to know that. He stilled as Ben went on. He’d heard the desperation in Ben’s voice on the phone and this explained it even though now Ben was using words which made it sound like less that it obviously was. To want someone to become the image of the dead was plainly brought on by more than just missing him.

“Photos are good, video would be better, but wait,” Matt said, reaching out to touch Ben’s arm to stop him from rising. He was cold to touch, but Matt didn’t pull back. “I’m sorry for your loss and I’ll try to help and… listen to what you want to tell me, if that’s what you want. This is just going to be us, isn’t it, it won’t be for anyone else?”

He had learnt his skills from his mother and practised them well, but Ben had loved this guy who was dead. Someone pretending to be him was never going to be right. Even if Matt had studied the man when he was alive there would be all sorts of mannerisms he might miss out on, things would make him not quite fit Ben’s pictures. Ben could correct him though, try to perfect him even if it was never quite right. In front of more people things would be more difficult. He could try to fool Ben for a while though and the look in those silver eyes was enough to make him want to.

"Tell me a bit about him and you," he said, giving Ben's arm a gentle squeeze.

[Trillian]

Ben, who hadn't been intending on hopping up immediately at Matt's answer, understood why the shifter had reached out to touch him, yet felt a bit weird about it.  Here was a man he was hoping to have the courage to be intimate with, but he didn't like being touched by him.  Not in this form anyway, and not yet.  He might not even want to touch him if he turned into Kerr perfectly; it was very possible that Ben wouldn't be able to accept the mimicry, that he would think this experiment unwise.  How had Kerr managed to keep Jack straight?  Jack had been using Ben's body, of course, but still, it hadn't been him, it hadn't been Ben.  His dead sire had given him permission to try this, he thought.  Kerr would understand, he thought.  It wasn't really cheating, like Kerr's being with Jack hadn't really been cheating.  Only at the end it had been a betrayal, when Ben had returned and Kerr had stuck with the being who'd stolen his body and image instead of returning to his genuine love.

"Only us," Ben confirmed, and his gaze raked Matt's form again, taking in the stranger that was sitting here with him, touching him on the arm.  Ben had forced himself not to pull away, for he didn't want to send the wrong message.  The squeeze on his arm wasn't welcome but he made himself sit through it.

"He was my lover.  He was my sire."  That was all this guy needed for now.  Ben figured he'd correct any mistakes as they went.  "He would comfort me with a hand on my shoulder, not on my arm," he said, and with his hand he took hold of Matt's wrist and set it upon the right place.  "Like that."

He watched Matt with some concern, because this was a peek into the kind of meeting this was going to turn out to be.  Depending on how good this guy was...

But no, don't think about that
Not when he hasn't changed
Don't think of being with him
Until he becomes Kerr

[pinkroses]

Matt kept his gaze on Ben as the vampire explained very briefly his bond with the dead man. He met a few vampires, not intimately enough to have recognised one straight away Ben had given enough now for Matt not to have to ask.

He let Ben move his hand and listened to his instruction. Copying a dead man, it was going to be a challenge. Learning someone’s mannerisms, the way they spoke and moved – it was difficult when someone was alive and you had time to study them properly. But he was going to be relying on pictures, film if he was lucky and Ben’s word. And by the sounds of it Ben was going to be a strict tutor.

“On the shoulder, got it,” Matt said with a nod. He’d replied to the advert because he had wanted something to interest him, a change, a challenge. This was definitely going to be that. Knowing this dead man had been Ben’s lover hinted that there might be more than just talking as well, but at the moment Matt didn’t believe Ben would be convinced enough to let it get that far.

His hand dropped away from the vampire’s shoulder and Matt rested his elbow on the arm of the sofa, his green eyes steady.

“Did anyone else call you after I did?” he asked, wondering whether this was an interview where he might not get the job.

[Trillian]

"No," Ben said, intrigued at the business-like way Matt had acknowledged Ben's instruction on a very minor point of how to touch him.

He stood now, and moved to where his laptop bag was.  He pulled out his laptop as well as the document wallet filled with photos - a lot of them enlarged and showing Kerr from a number of different vantage points.  Ben had also found one of him at the beach (and there were a few naked ones he had access to but wasn't going to share until things showed to be going a certain way), where Kerr was wearing just his trunks and was laying back on the sand, grinning up at Ben who'd stood over him and taken his picture.  The moon was full that night, and the camera had been a good one with a decent flash, so Kerr had ended up looking amazing and everything else around him was tinted with the blue tinge of night.

He gave the wallet of photos to Matt to have a look at while he returned to his seat and placed the laptop on the coffee table in front of both of them, and scrolled around until he had a folder full of photos and minute movies of Kerr, of varying quality - a lot of the movies were phone movies, but the photographs were plentiful.  There were no photos or movies of Kerr that were a waste of Matt's time - Ben had screened them all before coming.  It would probably take him half an hour to look at everything, if he looked quickly.  Twice that, if he took his time.

Before Matt got started, Ben thought he better ask his questions rather than wait for Matt to bring it up.

"Do you have anywhere else to be or can I have you most of the night?  Do you need to be compensated for your time?"

[pinkroses]

Matt leant back in his seat, the wallet of photos resting on his knees and he began to flick through a couple whilst Ben set up the laptop. He planned on going through them more carefully but wanted a look at the man he would become soon to get an overall feel before he took in more details.

He tore his gaze away from the pictures at Ben’s questions, giving a small smile. “No, I have no other plans tonight,” he said before pausing to consider the question of compensation. He hadn’t wanted to think about getting paid really before getting here since he hadn’t known what he would be faced with. Ben was obviously going through a lot and Matt found himself wanting to help him. The vampire obviously had money to spare as he’d hired this place, but it felt a little like profiting from death which Matt didn’t like the thought of. Of course, if Ben wanted to pay him for his efforts Matt wouldn’t say no, but he hadn’t come here for cash.

“You haven’t seen if I’m worth it yet,” he said, dropping his gaze to the pictures once again. There were a lot of them, and a look at the list of videos on the laptop showed Matt he would have a lot of material to work from. Fuck, Ben had put a lot of work into this.

Matt paused at a photo of Kerr stood with Ben and stared at it silently before standing up, gesturing for Ben to do the same as he placed the other photos on the table.

“What’s his name?” he asked, his eyes flicking between the photo and Ben, trying to gauge how much he would have to change physically. Without any other real measures to work against he’d have to use Ben to judge. He’d need another inch or so upwards, not too much of a change, it could have been worse, it could have been a lot more difficult if their body shapes had been too different. A skinny short kid would have been impossible to get the proportions right.

He gaze a small nod once Ben had replied and he’d figured out his height before taking his seat again, spreading out some photos as his fingers moved to the mousepad of the laptop.

“This might take a while to go through… do you want to go get a drink or something?” he said, glancing over his shoulder at Ben, his tone making it obvious it was more of a request that Ben leave for a while rather than a question of whether Ben was comfortable. Matt needed to focus on this and having Ben watching him would be distracting. There was plenty of time for Matt to ask any more questions he needed to after going through the material when Ben came back.

[Trillian]

The response was unexpected and Ben was taken aback.  He blinked at Matt for a moment and looked away, in the direction of the laptop.  It was funny how a short, simple declaration like that could stun him into silence.  Perhaps it was because he was anticipating a yes or no and not a stalling.  And what a way to stall!  It was the kind of comment he'd make, he thought, if their positions were reversed.  He didn't know whether or not he liked his own kinds of comments coming back at him.  He was beginning to understand why Kerr hadn't liked it when he'd communicated in such ways.  It wasn't mysterious so much as a veiled hint to back off.

The request for Kerr's name came next so Ben gave it to him in full.  "Kerr Galvin," he said, unsure if Kerr truly hadn't been recognised or if that was just the stance Matt was adopting.  If he read the kind of magazines Ben placed the ad in, then he would've seen pictures of Kerr multiple times, given he'd been the Luminary.  Not knowing what the Luminary looked like was a bit like not knowing what the Mayor of the city looked like, for humankind.  Mind, there'd been a change in power a short while ago and a woman had taken the reins to the city, and even though Ben knew her name he couldn't immediately recall what she looked like.  That was different though, she'd only just come to power while Kerr had held his seat for years.

Again, a nice way to dismiss him came about.  'Go get a drink' was the command, presented to Ben in pretty wrapping.  Yes, perhaps this guy was a professional after all.  Professional conman, maybe.  Answer the ad, pretend to be a shifter, don't actually show your talents to the mark and send him away so you can steal all the shit you can before he comes back.

"Sure," Ben agreed, but he leant over towards Matt in a way that might present his going in for a kiss, except he stopped when he got close enough to smell him past any soap or cologne on his skin.  Ben hadn't ever smelled an aspect shifter before, but Matt certainly didn't smell human.  There was a much more complex mix of smells in him, and none of them smelled like animal, like a were-shifter (and the only kind Ben had closer contact with, due to their being more prominent at the Oligarchy, though he had a vague memory of Conner having an aspect shifter on his spy staff).  He didn't take a huge sniff, so Matt might not know what he was doing, and he was peripherally aware that the shifter was now looking at him.

Ben pulled back and stood up, wiping his palms on the thighs of his pants as though they were sweaty or dirty when they were neither.  He took mental inventory of his stuff; the money, the laptop, the bag, the photos and movies, and knew that he had copies of the latter at home, so it wouldn't be terrible if his laptop got ripped off.  Everything else didn't matter so much, though he might have to pay a hotel bill of some kind if 'Matt' took stuff out of the room, too.

"I'll be an hour," he said, giving Matt more time than he himself needed to get a drink, and left the room.  He did as he said, heading down the street on foot and finding a relatively clean alleyway to skulk about in until finally a shopper came down it and he engaged them in conversation.  He drank from her, then stayed for another one, pleased that his next opportunity gave him a relatively large guy that he could drink a lot more from.  After that, he had to kill twenty minutes so sat in the lobby for a bit reading a fashion magazine and reminding himself that wearing lots of clothes and posing for photographs had actually been kind of fun.  He was about five minutes later than the hour deadline he'd given, and when he returned to his room, he entered without hesitation, swiping his card, hearing the lock click and pushing the door open.

[pinkroses]

Matt watched Ben with a raised eyebrow as the blonde leant towards him but then stopped there. What was he doing? Picking up his scent in case Matt made off with stuff? He hadn’t considered just running off with the laptop until that point, but he wasn’t about to do so now.

The name he’d been given was tickling at a memory, it sounded familiar and the face was too but Matt just couldn’t place it properly. He skim read the articles briefly on occasion, more so in the past few months as he’d made friends with a couple of people who cared more about the city politics than he did, but it wasn’t coming to him just yet.

He waited until the door was shut before he began to watch the videos, watching some once and a few a couple of times over. It was when his eyes fell on a picture of Kerr in a suit looking pretty serious that it finally clicked into place.

Matt immediately pulled out his phone and did a search for Kerr Galvin on a website linked to the supernatural magazine and a wealth of information appeared. Matt let out a slow breath as he read about Kerr, the ex-Luminary. He’d been brought to power after Lazarus and most articles implied the vampire done a good job of his role until the mimics had gone and the Oligarchy had been disbanded.

Matt forced himself to put away his phone before too long – reading gossip columns wasn’t going to help him imitate the man and it didn’t make any difference to what Ben wanted to do. Like they’d discussed, it wasn’t like he would be going outside and pretending to be the Luminary. Fuck.

After looking through the photos again Matt had pulled the computer onto his lap and watched with a thoughtful expression, trying to take in the way Kerr was moving, with that unnatural grace, the way he laughed, his turn of phrase. Hopefully Ben wouldn’t need him to talk all that much, Matt had doubts in his skills when it came to putting on accents and faking an Irish one could so easily sound mocking. Kerr and Ben both deserved more respect than that.

He had considered shifting before Ben returned, but he decided not to – he thought Ben coming home to an imperfect image of Kerr would be worse than watching the shift happen into that figure.

When Ben pushed open the door Matt was pouring over a photo of a topless Kerr, his fingers tracing lightly over the tattoos. He’d never really imagined a politician haven’t such a huge amount of body art – but then it had become obvious in the pictures they were usually covered up.

“Hey,” he said, frowning slightly, his head still full of turning his skin blue, but he shook the thought from his head and gave Ben a small smile. “I think I’m just about ready. After I’ve shifted you can point out any changes which might need making. Do you have any of his clothes or… an earring?” he asked, pointing at a photo which showed Kerr’s left ear. The photos didn’t show Kerr’s tongue stud and neither had the videos which Matt had spotted

“The tattoos are going to be difficult. I might need to work on them, they’re pretty intricate,” Matt added, his gaze flickering down to the photos again. “Do you need those tonight, or would a long sleeved shirt do?” he added, his green eyes settling on Ben. “And I can’t change my eye colour. The rest of it, fine,” he finished with, finally pausing after blurting out some of what he had been playing on his mind in the past hour.

[Trillian]

Ben approached slowly, curious about what Matt had said and not answering straight away as he considered the shifter's words.

"I don't have his clothes," he said, and thought about the wardrobe available to him back at the beach house.  If things did go well, he could picture himself inviting Matt over.  He could even imagine giving him a key, so he could come in, change, and then come find Ben.  Oh God, that would be amazing.  He was drymouthed for a moment as he pushed that thought back down, and focussed on the other questions.

"I wasn't expecting you to be able to do the tattoos," he admitted.  "I planned this but I didn't know what could be done, I guess."  His voice cracked on the last few words, and he blinked at the shock of hearing the anxiety come through that way.  He'd always been a smooth talker - how strange that his nerves would reveal themselves to this man.  "I just want to see," he said quietly, though loud enough Matt would hear him.  He was close, so he didn't have to speak up too much, thankfully.

[pinkroses]

Matt heard the break in Ben’s voice and gave a small nod again. This kid really was desperate and Matt wasn’t convinced this was the best thing for him – but Hell, Matt didn’t know him and he was curious as to how this would play out.

“Ok, that’s fine,” he said, standing up and taking a final look at the picture of Kerr before settling his gaze once again. His own clothes would still fit in his new form so that wasn’t too big an issue, but it would help the illusion if he had some of Kerr’s clothes too. Maybe Ben had got rid of them, but with the photos Matt could find stuff which would have been what Kerr might have worn. Perhaps not of the same quality though.

“Do you want to watch me shift or just see when I’m done?” he asked, in case Ben might get freaked out by watching it. He knew a couple of people who loved watching him change, but then there were others who were repulsed by it. Right now, with Ben’s emotions on edge, he didn’t want to risk him freaking out.

Whether Ben turned away or not Matt moved out from between the sofa and the coffee table, spinning the laptop around so that he could still see a picture of Kerr, a close up of his face looking quite sombre, but in a good light. His green eyes focused on Kerr’s brown ones for a few seconds before he shut them, his face creasing in concentration as he began to shift. His body flinched and his mouth worked silently as his body changed. There wasn’t the loud cracking which might have come with a human shifting into an animal, but there were a series of small cracking, popping sounds as his bone structure altered, his nose growing a little longer and his eyes being pushed a little closer together as his brow sank closer to them, his legs lengthening slightly and his spine stretching out. They were small changes, but altogether they made a different person.

It wasn’t too painful – he’d got used to what pain there was by now, but it wasn’t comfortable and it was always tiring. At least this wasn’t too huge a change – not like when he’d tried turning his body to look like a woman’s on a dare. All in all he didn’t feel too bad as he rolled his shoulders back, getting used to the new body. Matt glanced down at his long fingers stretching them with a crack before running a hand through his now shorter hair.

He cleared his throat quietly as he looked for Ben, wetting his lips and finally feeling a jangle of nerves in the pit of his stomach as he looked for the blonde’s reaction.

[Trillian]

Ben chose to turn away; not because he felt uncomfortable at the prospect of seeing someone shift in front of him (because he was actually quite curious) but because he felt like it would have more impact, to turn and see Kerr standing before him.  Of course he knew it wouldn't be Kerr, and there would be small imperfections (and the idea of them relieved him, in fact, that he wouldn't ever be fooled). No matter how perfect Matt got the shift, he would still have a heartbeat.

Ben looked when he was told to, and if he'd been breathing, his breath would've been stolen away.  Again, he knew it wasn't Kerr but it uplifted him to see him there.  He slowly got to his feet and approached Matt/Kerr, mesmerised by what he was looking at.

 Close your eyes. Please.

The request was given mentally, because he and Kerr often spoke this way to one another.  When those green eyes were hidden away behind closed lids, Ben reached up a hand and tenderly stroked the side of

Kerr's

Matt's face with his fingers.  Gently, his fingers traced the familiar jaw and chin, across the lips, and then both of his hands were on either side of Kerr's face, holding him in place.

"The tiniest bit taller," he whispered, and moved in to embrace the copy he had before him, if only to better measure the height between them.  It was a few millimietres off, but it was enough to feel wrong.