Revelation

[Trillian]

Lazarus was lounging in the sitting room with his bare feet up on the coffee table, crossed at the ankles. He was in his favourite outfit - a pair of jeans and nothing else. The room was dark except for the flickering television set, and Lazarus found himself strangely interested in the story that was unfolding before him. The movie was too loud for him to hear footsteps, but he was aware of the front door opening and lights coming on.

"Jake, love," Lazarus greeted, and his eyebrows shot up when Ben stalked past across the room, looking furious as he went to his bedroom and slammed the door shut behaving very much like the teenager he looked like rather than the years he'd lived. Lazarus coughed laughter before turning back to look at Jake. The movie at his back was ignored as he knelt on the couch and grinned at his boss/lover. "How'd the party go?" he asked.

[Black Philip]

Ben, Sam, and Jake all entered the flat. Sam had been told to avoid Lazarus like the plague, and she seemed to have no issue following the directive. Ben was pouting of course, and stormed off like a brat. And to think, he'd been so close to home and his precious Kerr. Despite Ben's sullenness, Jake looked almost giddy. He moved into the room and before telling Lazarus a word planted a happy kiss on him, almost as if he might've missed him. He stepped back beginning to undress as he responded.

"Evening gorgeous," he hummed. "You look nice like that." A shoe was thrown off. His cuff links were put on a table.

"It was a mixed bag but I think we did well overall. Your night go alright?"

Jake seemed curious how his social representative, his beautiful harpy, had spent his needed night off.

[Trillian]

Lazarus grinned wolfishly after their kiss and purred his delight at the strip show happening in front of him, even without any teasing. Perhaps because it was so straight-forward. He liked that idea; come home, strip, fuck, rest, fuck again, sleep. He was looking forward to Jake de-stressing with him.

"Better now you're back," Lazarus said, stepping off the couch and helping Jake with his shirt - using his teeth on the buttons to chomp them off and spit them out... Unless Jake didn't want him to ruin his shirt, that was, then Lazarus would poutily use fingers instead. "Any gossip?" he asked between buttons.

[Black Philip]

He let the buttons go. It was just a dress shirt, and the small amount of savagery was what he'd come to expect from the man doing it. Jake and Lazarus had the same thing in mind, the show being for him of course. Jake thought how best to answer Lazarus's question, and decided to go with official business before juicy gossip. 

"Well there is a new leader in the south," he said. "Charon gave it up. He played it like charity but his greedy little claws couldn't afford it. I heard thanks to you and my other sources. Do you know the witch Saint Sabrina?"

His tone was still mostly flirty, not attaching any emotion to Sabrina's name.

[Trillian]

Lazarus, in the middle of plucking a button off with his teeth, heard the name 'Sabrina' and gasped. The button went into his windpipe and he reeled back, choking and coughing to get the damned thing out. It was uncomfortable and he could feel it stuck in his throat. He staggered backwards, coughing and pounding his chest with his fist until the button flew like a tiny projectile out of his mouth and pinging against the buffet in the far corner.

Lazarus took in great gasps of air to cleanse his windpipe and also because it felt energising to puff out his chest and pant like a beast. He felt like a beast, in fact, and he wanted to tear and pull and tug and bite, but with Jake looking at him in surprise, he didn't want to turn that violence on Jake.

"FUCKING SABRINA!?" he yelled into the room with such force it seemed that even the furniture shrank from it. He twisted away and grabbed the closest thing to him - the coffee table - and upended it, flinging it with such force that it crashed against the wall and snapped in half. No mean feat, since Jake's furniture was solid. "Fucking Sabrina!?" he yelled again, stepping further into the room where there were small shatterable things on display. He wanted to break them, break it all, break everything. His flung his arm across the surface, and multiple items flew and crunched upon landing.

[Black Philip]

Jake had spent his entire life as a vampire slowly and carefully picking the items in his home. It was a nerdy habit, and an old one, but he had good taste and swelled in anger when his expensive and rare coffee table was smashed! Then other items, vases, art work, and glass. This would not work.

"Stop smashing my shit now!" Jake had never yelled, and stormed into the room, shoving Lazarus feebly due to the other's strength, but none the less he would not let his home be destroyed without a fight. He was nearing the Picasso. This had to end! "What... is... wrong... with... you..." His speech was broken up do the struggle taking place.

[Trillian]

Lazarus roared, annoyed that he was being stopped halfway through his rage. He turned on Jake and fought against him; now that his attention was on the other vampire, it was easy enough to use his superior strength and fling him across the room, too. When Jake landed, it woke Lazarus up from his red fugue and he was immediately awash with regret.

"Fuck! Jake..." he rushed to his lover's side, intending to hold him in apology - if Jake would let him.

[Black Philip]

Jake dodged the first few spastic flings at him. He didn't seem to be focusing where he was swinging. He was not prepared to be lifted and flung across the room. Lazarus underestimated his strength. Jake hit a wall, damaging the Sheetrock and sliding down to the ground. He was in shock. Nobody ever treated Jake like that. He was a warrior. He was a prince. He was... a child.

When Lazarus went to hold him, he let his attacker. He hadn't felt his youth this much in ages, but the last few weeks returned him to the feeling he had right after siring. He grabbed on, but didn't say anything. Unless Lazarus was being entirely dishonest in his regret he'd likely see how shook he'd made Jake with his show of strength.

[Trillian]

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Lazarus whispered, hating that this desperate reaction was what he'd brought out in Jake. He would've preferred insults, more fighting, even being told to get out... but this... It saddened him. It clenched his insides with guilt and shame. He felt bad about what he'd done. When had been the last time he'd ever felt bad about anything? It only proved that Lazarus felt more for him than intended. When had that happened? When had he started caring about anyone besides himself? "Sorry," he whispered again.

When had he ever apologised to anyone and meant it?

He cradled Jake into his arms, bridal style, and carried him across the broken room and to the bedroom, glad he didn't have to suffer Ben's eyes looking at him. He would've hated for him to have seen this moment. At least the little bastard hadn't been stupid enough to poke his head out of his room.

Lazarus kicked the bedroom door closed behind himself and set Jake down upon the edge of their bed and knelt in front of him. He couldn't see any blood, or any crushed part of his skull. Jake didn't look hurt, he just looked like he was in shock. He didn't know how to fix it. "Jake, love?" he asked, scared.

[Black Philip]

Jake wasn't home for a few moments, he was miles away. He noticed Lazarus pick him up, but if asked tomorrow he couldn't remember another thing. Ben was the farthest thing from his mind, but he would be glad later to know Ben hadn't seen such weakness. He'd point out that Lazarus was really in charge, that Jake was weak. Then he heard the blonde's voice again, first a bit hazy but then more clear.

"Yes," Jake said weakly, eyes slowly returning to awareness. "I -." He had no words to give. He laid down and made himself available to be spooned.

[Trillian]

In Lazarus' eyes, Jake was trying to get away from him. He didn't want that. He didn't want this to be the way they drifted apart. Jake seemed okay, but deep in thought, like he was trying to decide what to do, how to act, whatever. Lazarus hadn't experienced that kind of shock for so long that he'd forgotten what it was like... and how to deal with it.

"No, no, please," Lazarus clung to him, halting Jake's progress as he tried to turn on the bed. He couldn't bodily stop him from lying down (and didn't really want to, he'd done enough damage). How was he going to fix this? How could he prove to Jake that he was genuinely sorry? That he would do anything to make it up to him.

Anything. He would do anything. He would do that one thing he never did. Jake might not appreciate the depth of the gesture right now, but he would certainly understand his dominant role in it. Lazarus had told him already that he would never get on his knees, that he would never submit to another man, that he would never worship them with his tongue - that it was demeaning for a man of his status and age.

Maybe it would help him come around. Sex always helped people come around, right? It made the world go around and all that.

"Wait, my love. Shh, wait. Look what I can do, what I'm doing for you. Look, look." As he spoke, he unbuckled Jake's pants and pulled them down, hooking his fingers into them to reveal Jake's penis, flaccid and unresponsive. "You can watch, watch me. See how sorry I am?" Lazarus pulled Jake closer to him by his hips and took everything into his mouth, all that he could. His tongue worked circles and his lips pressed firmly, trying his best to inject life. He might be out of practise but he'd been performed on many times. He knew exactly what to do. He was chagrined that at first he got nothing, but then there was a twitch and he murmured his hope.

It didn't occur to him that Jake might not want this and wasn't in a state to let him know either way.

[Black Philip]

There are those moments in life where we're not in control. That can be hard for some people. Jacob McCloud was in a tower. He was chained and had been whipped for hours, a combination of dry and wet blood running down his body. He was tired. He was hungry for viate, and the beam of moonlight on his face would be the sun soon. His jailer gave him another lash.

The fifty year old vampire cried in pain, while the ancient beat him. "Who are you," he asked again.

"I am Ventrue. I am Jacob." Another lash! "Who are you boy?"

This had gone on for hours, and his weak naked body shook in pain and fear of the rising sun. "I am no one," he finally said. His jailer walked forward and pulled down his cloak. The handsome features of a man from the Greek city state of Thebes stared at him. His physical age was older than the youth's, and his vampire age was over two-thousand. Jake looked at the face of his mentor, Mithras. He'd been speaking out of turn again. He'd questioned things. He'd told his elders they were wrong. He'd needed to be punished and Mithras loved to hurt the boy. When he relented and admitted he was no one the pain stopped. Mithras approached him and grabbed his face by the chin. He simply looked at him before planting a fat, unwanted kiss. "You are so beautiful. Don't waste the blood."

"Yes master. Whatever you say."

~~~

Jake looked upon Lazarus "submitting" to him. His penis hardened as what was happening was physically arousing, but internally Jake felt twisted up, like a steel knife had slid between his ribs. He wanted to stop him. He knew he should stop him. But he couldn't. He felt so weak, and so helpless, and at least Lazarus was trying to make it better. He laid back on the bed, moaning at intervals, feeling himself getting closer and closer. He closed his eyes and finished, and he saw not Lazarus's face but his old tutor Mithras.

Who are you?

Fearing another whip, Jake whispered softly, "I am no one."

[Trillian]

Shudders racked Jake's body as he came and Lazarus swallowed it, licking whatever he hadn't caught. Lazarus heard what was said shortly afterwards but didn't know why. He thought it might be in relation to the way he'd thrown Jake around.

"You're not no-one," he insisted, though his voice was soft and gentle. He stood and crawled beside Jake, laying at his side and petting his chest and face, wanting to hear words like 'forgive' and 'thank you' for the act he'd performed. He wanted acknowledgement that they were moving past this, that it wouldn't be held against him. That he wouldn't be thrown out. "You're Jake McCloud. You're my boss. You're leader of the city central and the west."

He searched Jake's face for a clue as to how he felt now, now that Lazarus had proved himself.

[Black Philip]

And then it happened, that horrible internal urge to protect the self. Jake's mind railed to his own defense, and he looked to his arrogance, his greed, and his entitlement. He wrapped himself in those things like they were a fine linen. His face became more neutral. He was back, and he began to wonder if this wasn't what he wanted. Lazarus was calling him boss, reminding him he controlled the largest district in the city. Surely he couldn't be weak. Lazarus was right and he turned towards the man who'd just give himself in a way he never did normally. Jake felt he was going to be okay.

"Thank you," Jake said, wrapping his arms around him with a smile and snuggling under Lazarus's chin. He didn't say forgive though, an unconscious part of himself still knowing he was horribly wronged.

[Trillian]

Relief sped through his veins like he'd drunk from someone potent and Lazarus smiled his bliss. Jake was back to normal. His supplication had worked and Jake was turning to him and holding him like he had before. His decision had been a good one. Still, he didn't want Jake to spread it around that Lazarus had done that for him. He might even do it for Jake again - it hadn't been so bad.

All this was Sabrina's fault. He blamed her for this terrible moment as surely as he blamed her for casting a spell on his identity. He wasn't going to say her name in case Jake went back to that doll-like manner. It had scared Lazarus terribly, that he might've broken his lover. He had to remember that Jake wasn't ancient.

"You're welcome," Lazarus purred, kissing the top of Jake's head and still tasting him in his mouth and in the back of his throat.